ANN

Numbness. Spirit and body. It was all over and yet I could no longer feel. All I could do was sit in the DEA's New Orleans office and listen to a roomful of big men discuss the remains of this day. We all had to make preliminary statements before they'd let us leave. Just paperwork, Dino had assured me. We'd been in the office about ten minutes. I was already sick of being there. I wanted to go home.

They were taking Jack's statement in another room. And there I still sat. Numb. Wonder what I'll remember to tell them when it's my turn, I thought.

At some point, I felt myself take a breath. And I realized I could see again. You know what I mean? When you can see that you're not the only one who's been wounded by the things that have been done to you?

I saw Terry standing against the wall and recognized that look on his face. The inward stare. And then I saw the blood on his face and hands. I went to him and touched his chest. He gave me an empty smile.

"Let's get you cleaned up. Don't want Uma to faint when she sees you," I told him.

I took him in the ladies room and he never said a word. I kept waiting for him to make a wisecrack but he never did. I wet and soaped paper towels; knelt before where he sat on a closed toilet. Mopped up the blood on his hands first. Then attended to his face.

"There now. Your ugly mug's restored," I said, still trying to get him to see me.

Blink. "Annie? Are you really okay?"

I leaned up and kissed him lightly on his mouth. "Do you have any idea how happy I was to see you come walking in that room? Thank you for what you did, Terry."

Giving me that brief nod he does. Then a light seemed to go on in his eyes. "We made it, didn't we?"

Why this reaction? Maybe I just needed him to understand how he made me feel. But I took his face in my hands and drew his lips to mine. It started out slow but it escalated in nothing flat. Kissing like we had just remembered how we weren't letting go of the other in this Game. I felt almost desperate that we have this one moment to acknowledge the magnitude of what we had gone through together. More grateful than he could ever have known that even in the worst moment, I had known he'd never let me down.

But when it was over, all we could do was whisper promises to each other that this was not where or when we would say anything meaningful to the other about the future or the past. We returned to the squad room to wait to give our statements.

Rawlins and his operation were dead. Many of his men, too. A few arrests; some were in the hospital. Four agents with minor wounds; one in the ER but he would be fine once they got the bullet from his shoulder.

Fleeting thought. Thank God they wear Kevlar when they do assaults. I had a sudden premonition and felt dizzy. I remember the small details. Jack was walking out of the room. Terry was staring out a window.

Then Dino said, "Let me see the list again."

"Where the fuck is Raul?" Dino asked suddenly and the room fell silent. "He's not on the casualty list and he's not on the arrestee list."

Several of the men huddled around Dino and they searched the lists.

"Terry? Where's Uma?" I said. Because I knew. I did.

His face went rigid and he whipped out his cell. And then he was running out the door and we all ran after him. Jack and I jumped in the back seat; Dino drove. Terry simply dialed and redialed.

Behind us, in the dark, I could see the headlights of several cars coming with us. I could hear them racing to keep up with Dino.

"She's not answering?" I asked quietly.

"Land line's busy. I keep getting put through to her voice mail on the cell. Probably has it off," he said and I thought he was barely holding the frayed edges together.

"Call the operator. Have her break in on the land line. Maybe she's talking to someone else...?"

Minutes passed as we listened to Terry talking, slow, clear. Explaining to the operator that it was an emergency. And then he didn't say anything for a while. Then he punched his phone off.

"Line's dead," he said and I knew Terry was in a different place than the rest of us.

Jack hugged me against him and I closed my eyes. We all knew where Raul had to be heading. We were maybe fifteen minutes away.

UMA

I have seen enough scary movies in my time to have worked it out, really. You always laugh when it happens. The fake ending. You know, the one where everything is hunky dory and they all clap each other on the back and then up pops the bad guy for a final go at them. You always think - why are they surprised? Don't they go to the movies? But I'm telling you now - straight up- when you are dying of fear and anxiety and Terry Thorne calls and says 'You're all right,' then you believe it. I won't laugh at those cliché moments again.

He told me they were safe. No one was hurt. The bad guys were dead. They had Ann back. And then he told me that he loved me and he was coming for me and I forget everything else in my delirium. I don't think I had taken a proper breath since he had left. Every moment had seemed to tick by like an hour and I was unable to think of anything but them and what they were doing. I sat on the bed, locked into the bed room, with my legs pulled up to my chin as I rocked backwards and forwards and tried to be brave.

I picked up a book but I could not read. On the bed in front of me was the gun. It was silver and black, slim and elegant. It was called a Beretta Neos; Terry had once said it was a favoured handgun for professionals. I had joked that it would match any outfit - God, the crass things I say at times! He has another gun in his case. It's a Browning 9 mm- he prefers it but it's heavier than the Neos and less convenient if you have to grab it in a hurry.

The Browning is one of the SAS weapons he used when he was in CCB. Don't suppose you know what that is, do you? There is a group of 20 of the most select soldiers in the SAS who are specialists in what they call Close Combat Battle. Their nickname is the Keeni Meenis. Keeni Meeni is a Swahili term that describes the slick movement of a snake through grass. The CCBs are used in counter terrorism and highly specialized covert missions, usually behind enemy lines and without back up. One of their selection tests was to wear Arab garb and then remove a handgun from beneath their robes and fire six shots through a playing card erected 15 metres away from them in a ludicrously short number of seconds. Few pass the test or any of the other rigorous elimination rituals. Terry was top of his class. He didn't tell me that - Dino did. Terry just shrugged and said 'You have to move fast in a dunny if you see a funnel web spider. I was training since I was a kid.' He never makes a big deal of what he can do. He just does it.

I sat there and recalled what he had once said about firing a gun. He hated me to mess with any of his but he reckoned I should know. Knowledge is always better than ignorance, he says - and he's right. 

"Safety catch here. Don't fucking touch it. If you do, you mean you're going to fire it. Got that?" I had nodded.

"OK. Now if the unthinkable should ever happen and you have to fire a gun, hold it like this." He demonstrated the double handgrip - difficult for him to do with his large hands.

"Stand with your legs apart for balance. Point centrally. Keep your hands steady. Breathe. Don't hold your breath. Nothing fancy. Aim for the gut. Then you will get somewhere after the recoil. Empty the chamber - you might only wing them the first time. Just makes them angrier. Keep on shooting."

I picked up the gun and looked at it. I got off the bed and struck an attitude, catching sight of myself in the bedroom mirror. I didn't look like one of Charlie's Angels. I looked like a prat; it actually made me laugh, despite the way I was feeling. I thought of how Terry would howl if he caught me posing with a gun. If I ever see him again, I don't care if he laughs at me all day long.

I threw the stupid gun down on the bed and picked up the magazine. It was 'Beautiful Homes.' I threw that down as well, returned to my foetal position and cried quietly, curled up on the pillow.

Time passed and finally the call came. It was over. Who the hell looks behind them then? Not me, that's for sure. I jumped up and ran about the house, like something possessed. Then I decided to smarten myself up. I looked dreadful. My hair was all mussed up, my makeup smudged over my face and the tarty clothes I had put on that morning were woefully unsuitable for what I had in mind. It would be like something out of a movie. A Gone with the Wind moment - the one we never saw where Scarlett finally decided to give Rhett the shagging that he deserved.

I ran a bath and lazed in it for a while, washed my hair, rubbed on lotion, spritzed and sprayed. Then I ran around contemplating what to wear. First I decided on some of the underwear I had bought - but then I had an idea. He didn't pack any. Maybe he would appreciate ...So I chose a shirt of his, his favourite style, a very expensive white pure cotton tailored one that I noticed he had with him. Me - in his shirt - starkers. He'll be pointing north in two seconds- you can count on it.

I touched up my face...really subtle... big eyes, pale cheeks...wan look with glossed lips. I posed and thought I looked designer waif. He would go all He-Man if he saw me like that, God bless him.

You wouldn't believe it. I was actually sitting there playing with my makeup and posing like some Babe in the Wood singing 'Baby, sweet baby...you look so good to me, baby.' Can you imagine the scene? A professional hit man with a gigantic grudge against me is at the bedroom door and I am dancing around with no knickers on before a mirror and singing. It could only happen to me.

I spun round with a yelp and saw Raul standing silently in the doorway, a knife in his hand. He was sweating and there was blood on his shirt.

"Uma...just the girl I was looking for. You might say the girl of my dreams. Ain't you the picture. Yeah, sweet baby...you look so good to me, baby..."

I backed away in horror. You know, fear is a strange thing. Or is it adrenalin? You never quite do what you might think. Instead of having the raving abdabs, which is what I would do if I saw a mouse or a cockroach (not to mention a snake), I simply answered him in a voice that I swear didn't belong to me.

"Raul, how nice to see you again. Do come in. Make yourself at home. Can I get you a cup of tea? I was wondering how long it would take you to show up."

He sneered and wiped his hand across his forehead. He was leaning slightly on the door lintel and there were bruises on his hands and face. It was clear he was injured but I couldn't be sure how badly. What should I do? Terry was on his way, so if I could just keep him talking...

"You are some bitch, I'll give you that. But you'll squeal just like your friend did when I cut her."

"You're lying, Raul. It's all over for you. They did it. Got Ann and blew a hole through your little game. What's the point coming for me? You got a chance to get away. Do it before they get here. 'Cos Terry will skin you alive if he knows you're threatening me..."

Raul laughed, a mirthless sound. "Big hero, is he, this Terry? 'Fraid I've got some bad news for you, chica. Your husband's dead. They all are. It's just you and me now. My turn for some of your honey." He advanced towards me menacingly.

"What? I just spoke to him. You're lying. I'm not falling for that. They're on their way..."

"He called you and then I shot him and the whole tribe, too. Believe it, girl. Or else how come I'm here? He told you I was dead, didn't he? Got that wrong as well. I'm alive. Lover boy's dead. Poor Uma. Never mind...Raul now, he's got a big dick, too...that's what you like, no? Let me show you...see if you can earn the right to live just a little bit longer."

Your life really does flash between your eyes. Well, a part of it does anyway. I saw the whole of our time together in an instant - every laugh, every kiss, each time he had loved me, all our talks and hopes and dreams, places we had been, mornings lying in his arms, each time we had fought and then cried and then fought some more. Easter and the nightmare of his leaving me, Barcelona and the indescribable joy of his return. Could it be true? Wouldn't I feel it somewhere in my heart if he were dead? Where was he then? It was at least two hours since he had rung. Why wasn't he here? Could it be true?

"I took him, honey...Oh, he was good but Raul is better. Younger. Stronger. You'll see, bitch. Raul is better. I am The Man. He took a lot to bring down but I got him. He took his mind off the game. You should never do that. It's a new game now, baby... maybe you join Raul for the ride?"

His words rolled off me. I only heard one thing. He is dead. I took him. I got him. Could it be true? Someone somewhere must be strong enough. Law of averages.

"Your friend. She fought me. Like a tigress. Pity - I would have liked to fuck her. But...too bad. I like my women breathing."

Ann! You would fight, I know you would. What was it like when he mowed them down? Did you see them die? I hope it was quick. At least he didn't rape you. Am I the only one left? Coldness crept through me. I had stared at the Medusa's head and was stone. Feeling drained from me. Ice ran through my veins. My heartbeat seemed to slow to a plod as I struggled with the enormity of his words.

"He called your name...that's all he said. Just your name. It's always a woman who brings a man down. Time you paid for that, Uma...overdue payment coming."

He called my name - the realization echoed through my brain like a shout in an underground labyrinth. He called my name- it had the ring of truth. He was gone. If it were true then nothing in the world mattered anymore. I wasn't afraid. There could be no blow more fatal than that he had already struck. I was lost already - I didn't want to stay around without Terry. Raul could only do me a favour. But if I was going, I was going to damn well take the murdering bastard with me.

"You touch me and you will be sorry you were ever born. I'm not just his wife. I have an unusual life style. He has brothers who will hunt you down if you harm me. They are formidable men who will tear you limb from limb for what you have done." All the time I talked, I eyed up the distance between the bed and me. On the bed was a gun. He didn't know. If I moved then he would stop me; he was faster than me, even injured.

"So, this family of yours. That explain that crazy story your friend tried to tell me about her being the lover and you the wife?"

"Something like that. We share our favours with the other men. It's like an extended family."

His eyes flared. "So - I just joined your family. Get on the bed."

I swallowed hard. On the bed. Did he actually say that?

"Look - if I let you do it...let's call it quits, hey? Then get the hell out. Please."

"On the bed, bitch. Lift up that shirt." I stepped back and unfastened it slowly until it fell open. He breathed heavily. "Madre de Dios..." and he went for his zipper. I don't remember thinking. I just could hear Terry's voice in my brain. It was like he had left me with a final gift: the strength to make this man pay. And he would pay for what he had done to me and my family.

"When you get the chance - move. Don't think once you are committed. Just act."

I sat on the bed and opened my legs, sliding my hands behind me, inviting him to move on me. He walked towards me, stroking his cock, the knife now in his left hand. My fingers trembled as they reached beneath the magazine and closed round the welcome hardness of steel.

Safety catch here. Don't fucking touch it. If you do, you mean you're going to fire it.

I flicked the catch. It seemed to resound like a crack in my ears but Raul didn't hear it. He was standing before me, panting, and he jerked his head. "Lie down. Part your legs. Wider."

I lay down and let him come to me, counting slowly in my head to calm me down.

Breathe. Don't hold your breath. I breathed in rhythm to my counting.

Raul sank to his knees and groaned as he touched me. I swallowed the bile in my throat and let him. I whispered. "Come here...let me feel you..." and he rose above me, looking down to watch himself as he entered.

He sank himself in and I shuddered. I brought my hands around his neck and turned the gun to his flesh. He felt the steel but it was too late. I fired. He pulled away with a shocked expression in his face. He wasn't dead. There was blood everywhere, spurting but he was still looking at me. I put my hands together and began to pump that chamber empty. I don't actually remember doing it. I don't remember how I felt. I think I was totally numb. I think a voice said. "That's for Ann and that's for Jack and that's for Dino and that's for those sweet boys and that's for...He slumped onto me and I guess I passed out. Or maybe I just died a little, too. Everything is blank from then on.

ANN

Reaction mode. It's where we all were.

We heard the first gunshot when Terry's door opened. He was running, gun out, and the car hadn't even stopped yet. By the time it rocked to a stop, the rest of us were out. Dino yelled at me to stay out of the way. He and Jack were maybe two seconds behind Terry.

I think I jumped with each shot that came after. Five. With each one, I backed further from my front door. It was hanging on its hinges after Terry had kicked it open.

Four DEA agents swarmed in after Terry, Dino and Jack.

I didn't want to know. But there's another part of me that has to know. That part kicked in and I went racing in after them.

Jack caught me around my waist as I neared the top of the stairs. I fought him with so much energy and anger that he had to put me down and wrap his arms around me to gain control of my body. I was still trying to get up there. He was behind me, holding me hard, whispering in my ear. And I was sobbing.

And finally I heard him. She was alive.

It's all I heard. I stopped fighting Jack and let him hold me. And then he let me go. I heard odd snippets of voices.

Dino saying there was a knife ... lots of blood ...  He was worried, I could hear it. Terry was trying to talk to her ... He was shaking, I could hear it. What makes such strong men so worried and so shaky?

I looked at Jack as I took a step toward the bedroom. He shook his head at me and mouthed to me, begging me not to go in. I looked back at the bedroom. I couldn't see in because two big DEA guys blocked my view.

Terry saying she didn't seem to be injured, just in shock. His voice, now sounding a mix of pride and giddiness, saying she'd let Raul come right to her and shot him as he did. "God, she's amazing."

I took a step closer, put my hand on one of the DEA guys. He just looked at me. 

"Let me in. Now. I want to go in there to be with her," I told him in a voice much too loud for the small space in which we were standing.

Terry telling Jack to keep me away. Then telling Uma to come back to him, that he couldn't take anymore. 

Inside my head, I was talking to Uma: Come back because he needs you to make it worth his while to take another breath. 

And then Uma's voice, like she was arguing with herself. Thinking she had died. That we were all dead.

The bottom seemed to fall out of me. I tugged on the DEA guy. Tried to shove him. He pushed me toward Jack. "Take her downstairs," he told Jack.

"You stupid jerk. Get the fuck out of my way before I ..."

I felt Jack's hand on my elbow. I reached back for him and let him take me down to the kitchen.

The paramedics passed us on the stairs. I knew both of them. I never even recognized them. Much later, they were talking with me as they shone a light in my eyes. Asking me which ER I wanted to be transported to. I told them to fuck off.

Jack apologized for my rudeness, profusely. But the paramedics just laughed. "We'll take that as refusal to enter the ambulance for further treatment," one of them said. I walked them out to their rig.

"What about my friend? Are you taking her in to be checked out?" I asked them.

"Her husband told us to fuck off," he told me. "Seems to be a recurring theme tonight."

"We've all been through a lot. We're tougher than we look. All we need is some peace and quiet and ..."

I almost said we'd be back to normal. Normal? Who am I kidding?

Might never have gone back inside my house if Jack hadn't come to find me. I was sitting on my back deck and breathing with the night. He made me scoot forward on the chaise lounge so he could come sit behind me. He pulled me down so I was lying back against his chest.

"Do you remember the first constellation I showed you?" he asked me. His voice seemed at ease, full of the strength of him.

"Perseus," I told him. "We were on the dock at the lake cabin."

"Just so." His arms hugged in around me. "How pleased I am that you remember. I have never forgotten that night, my little dear. There are nights when the memory of your face in that moment you came to kneel before me brings me the sweetest of sleeps."

I smiled inside and felt myself relax into him. "It was such a good night. We've had so many good nights, Jack."

"And we will have many more good nights, amorata. This night was one bad night that will someday not matter quite as deeply as it does now. There are so many ways in which a night such as this can change us. But I know this. We have come through this night and have found ourselves blessed to be among friends and lovers. That we must not allow to change."

The stars above me were among the things I shared with Jack. I wanted to share his nature to seize onto the positive things that you encounter in life. I wanted to be strong enough to realize that I had to face what had happened in the last few days. Face it head on. Face it knowing things happen for a reason.

"Friends and lovers." I turned in his arms and nestled against his chest. Hugged around his waist and listened to his heart beating. "Jack, I need to tell you something."

"He loves you," he whispered to me. "And I am so very happy for you that you know this now."

"When did you know?"

"It is good to see that you have placed things right between you. There was a part of you missing as you attempted to run from how you felt," he said. He kissed me on the top of my head and then I felt his cheek rest there. "As for when ... that is not as important to me as to have witnessed the proof of his love of you. He never showed the briefest hesitation - even when he believed he would die along with you. I have learned new reasons to be proud to call him Brother."

"Oh, Jack." It choked me up and he let me blubber against him. "I can't believe I have you in my life. I would never have survived this without you. When I was there ... When they told me they'd given Terry the necklace as proof they had me, I knew how it would affect you. Every time I got low, I would think about the necklace and feel you with me. I would see your face, hear you talking to me and I just knew you would never give up. All of you ... I just knew you'd come for me. I was so scared at first because I thought you'd walked into an ambush but then when they made the phone call and I knew you were alive ..."

"I never doubted that you would have the courage to do this, my love. Never. I never considered for a moment that you would give up. I knew you would be ready to do what was needed."

"The only thing I tortured myself about was the phone call." I sat up and looked at him. My hand on his face. "I couldn't believe that the last words you might hear from me were so stupid. 'Tell Jack I'm okay.' I wish I'd said, 'Tell Jack I love him.' My last words should have been ones you could have held on to forever if I didn't come back. I hated that I screwed up the words again."

He laughed and it rang out in that night like a deep bell. When he finished, he pulled me to him for a long kiss. Whispering to me, "But, Ann, you did say the perfect words. The very fact that the first thought you sought to express was a message for Terry to deliver to me to calm my fears? It told me everything. It told me that I was first in your life. Truth comes in such moments, my little dear."

Inside my house, chaos still reigned. Outside, where I was, a sense of order was being restored.

He reached in his pocket and I saw something glinting in his hand. "May I be so bold?"

I lifted my hair and Jack placed the heart necklace back around my neck. He told me he'd carried it with him the whole time, waiting for the right moment to give it back to me. We would go on from here, Jack said, and we would be stronger in our bonds. All of us.

And I knew who he meant. We'd all been through so much. And not a one of us hadn't been important to getting the others safely through this. Uma. Terry. Dino. Jack. Me. What we had shared ... I will never forget how it felt.

And as Jack says, you cannot second guess life. You just live it. Full out.

We didn't stay in my house that night. The crime scene investigators were just getting started when Jack and I went back inside. I asked Dino how long they'd take and he said it could be a while. He was making sure they got everything right so there'd be no problems for Uma in terms of proving that the shooting had been self-defense.

And Dino proved again what a good friend he could be. He said he'd stay in the house and oversee the cops' efforts. He told us to pack a bag and go find a hotel room for the night. Terry had already had Uma shower in our bathroom and he was packing up things for them - they would be going back to the penthouse at the Windsor Court.

"There's another bedroom, you know. If you and Jack want ..." Dino said. "I can just stay here."

I shook my head instantly. "No, I want to be alone with Jack tonight." But there was another reason. It just didn't seem right to be in that penthouse with Jack after what had happened the night with Terry. We took a room in a small hotel about ten minutes from my house.

On the way out my door, I had grabbed two bottles of wine, glasses, cheese, bread, fruit, cookies ... well, any kind of food I could toss in a bag, frankly. I chose the hotel on purpose. It has a primary attraction - huge bathtubs in each suite.

We took a shower first and got all the grime off of us. I had to scrub hard to get rid of that damned camo paint - it refused to let go of Jack's skin at first. He didn't complain, though, because the entire time I was working on his face, he was washing and re-washing my breasts. Kept claiming it was the only part of me he could reach to soap up.

We scampered across from the glassed-in shower and sunk into the warm bubbles of the water in the tub. We both gave these loud exaggerated sighs of contentment.

I had the food and wine placed on the wide ledges that surrounded the tub. For a long time, we just lounged against each other and nibbled. Okay, well, I nibbled; Jack ate heartily.

The wine swam in my veins; it soothed my brain. I babbled; Jack babbled.

He held me when I finally cried it all out. I was laughing at some joke he made and I saw his eyes watching me. It did me in because I knew he knew I was trying hard but that I just needed to be weak with him for a while. He never asked for details; any he got were gleaned from this running, disjointed stream of emotional memories of the things that had happened to me. Jack does not require details in times like this; he simply knows. And he understands me that sometimes I will never tell all.

The feeling of him, caring for me. I never do it justice in any diary, I think. It's too immense. It's too powerful. It's the little things. It's the big things.

It's how he will do things like pick me up soaking wet from a tub and settle me on his knee while he dries me with a towel. He does it in silence. Like it's that important to him to get it right.

It's how he carries me to the bed and leaves me there, snuggled under the blankets, while he cleans up the mess in the bathroom. And then brings the rest of the wine in, stopping at the side of the bed, nude, damp, pouring the wine into two goblets I've brought from home.

It's how he proposes a toast to a new day, a new reason to greet the sun. To create a new memory of love in that night so that the dawn finds us in full memory of how much our love renews us.

It's how, after he's loved me back to life, he lets me fall to sleep to the sounds of him playing his violin and I can hear within the strains of his music that his heart is full of the depth of his gratitude that he was able to be there to help save my life.

It's also how I open my eyes in the morning to find him watching me. How his hands are in my hair, spreading it out around me on the pillow. How he smiles when he first sees my eyes are on him.

"I love you, Jack," I whisper to him in that new dawn. "How did I get so lucky to find you?"

Pirate smile, commanding hands. "It is I who am the lucky one, amorata. Lucky Jack, do you smoke it?"

But no laugh in this morning. Only that seducing murmuring he has taken to doing with me. As if he cannot contain what he feels for me in those moments and wishes there were ways to show it all to me.

I love the feel of his hands. I can't hide it from him. Not that morning or any other. They search my skin to find my weaknesses. They exploit me. They take from me. They give more back to me.

I love the way he makes me gasp. As if I have never been made to feel this way before. And in this morning, it is his hands that make me gasp first. I am kneeling before him according to his desires as he lazes back against the headboard, stroking me. He is telling me that I will come for him. And as I obey him, I gasp so loudly that he allows me to ease toward him so he can hold me safe while I am at my weakest.

"Kneel up here, right at my chest," he tells me. He picks me up and deposits me back on the bed so my knees straddle his hips. He has slunk down a bit and seems almost indolent in the way he regards me. He takes a breast in his mouth, appearing that it is an absent-minded gesture and only done because the opportunity was too easy to pass up.

I touch his hair and lean over him. His hands rest softly on my hips but slowly they move to my buttocks and he is lifting me toward him. I can feel that I am laying down a wet trail on his torso as he gently moves me back and forward. When he takes my other breast in his mouth, into his hand he takes the one he's abandoned. I moan most obscenely.

He chuckles around my breast. He pulls away finally and our eyes meet. He knows I am close. "Stay just as you are, amorata."

And I feel him slide down the headboard, his body moving between my legs until ...

"Oh God," I whisper it out; it's all I can do to breathe. His fingers have spread my folds and I know what he's doing. He's making note of what he does to me. I wonder if I'm dripping into his mouth; that fleeting thought makes me shiver deliciously.

His tongue wipes away the thought. But I don't start quivering until he has licked me to such sensitivity that the least sucking movement on his part can make me come. Not that he does that just yet. First he wants two fingers to be exploring me, pretending he does not quite know how he wants to work them inside me.

I know what he wants. He wants me to plead with him in that sweet way of lovers who know mercy is at hand. The way you plead when you know it makes him understand how easy it will be for him to make you ...

Scream.

I choke with the way it feels to enjoy the release's aftermath. That languid feeling in which a man you love could bend you into a pretzel if he wanted.

Jack has scooted back up to sit before me. I watch him through my lashes. He crooks a finger at me, points down and I grin at the sight. I love the beauty of his cock. I love the taste of it. I love to show him the way I feel.

He does not last long. He rarely does. I tease him that I am going to send him to learn Tantric sexual techniques for daylong lovemaking but he just groans at me when I do. And then he pulls my mouth to his, both hands on my face, his mouth pressing into mine, the force of him transferred to his mouth.

But soon, he has transferred his power to his shaft and he is helping me drop to the root. We go slowly; he knows how much better this is for me.

Before long, we are moving against each other and he is ardent in his noises. I love Jack when he's almost mindless in pursuit of his orgasm. It is such a turn on to have him react that way with me. This time, though, I fly into a coming long before him and I realize he wanted it this way. He wanted to watch, to see, to learn.

He takes my hands and tells me to lie back; to trust in him. I take a deep breath and fall back. We lock arms and he is pulling me back to him while he begins to thrust harder. I close my eyes and feel as though I am sailing. Like I could let go and I could be anywhere in the world.

I am brought back to earth when he drops one of my hands and his fingers rub my clit.

"Oh my God!" It shocks me with the suddenness of the coming, with the fullness of it. I wonder that my heart keeps beating when it is going this fast. "Jack! Oh MY GOD!"

And as I sob, he comes in me. I hear him, almost choking in the release; it is a sound I could live on and never go hungry again.

We almost drift apart, as if our boats are riding independent currents. He lets me fall from his grip and I learn to breath again as I lay between his legs. My hands rub the hair on his calves, not wanting to really lose complete contact. But then he leans over and his hands at my waist pull me back up. I feel like I might have lost most of the bones in my body. He cradles me in his arms and his voice sounds hoarse. "Are you all right, my love?"

It is the echo of a question from Terry. Am I all right? I consider this. Think where I am. Safe in the arms of Jack. Reunited with Terry. Deepened in the affectionate bond with Uma. Firmed forever in an understanding friendship with Dino. Every other Brother I have ever cared for remains my special friend. I have my Sisters. My family is intact. We are all safe.

"I'm not just okay, I'm happy. Never been happier, I think," I tell him.

UMA

"Easy now...easy...let go of the gun...let go of the gun...Tink, listen to me, relax your fingers...OK, I got it... here Dino, take it. Yeah...she's breathing...but she's not responding...there's blood every-fucking-where. But I can't see any signs of injury. Help me...move that fucking cunt off her."

"Terry...it's his blood. She's emptied six bullets into him. Jesus... Terry she's OK. It's shock...just talk to her...paramedics will give her a shot...cover her up, Terry. She's naked..."

"Terry...the fucker's pants are open...you think he touched her? Check her, Terry. He had a knife...Christ, maybe he..."

"No, she looks OK. Can't tell...doesn't look damaged. She hit him when he lay on her...she let him come to her and then she shot him. Can you believe that? Like a real pro. God, she's amazing."

"You said it, Terry. Some lady. Talk to her, man...she's in there somewhere. She just fainted. Like she always does. After the event. Blood rush. What a girl."

"Jack - keep Ann away. Don't let her see this. Baby...can you hear me? Can you hear me? You're safe now. It's me. Terry. I'm here. I'm holding you. Please...say something...say anything...please, talk to me...I can't stand any more..."

I was somewhere else and I could hear his voice.  Everything was dark. Pitch black. Just his disembodied voice. You are dead. How can you talk to me? Am I dead? Am I with you? Did I die?

"No...you're alive. I'm alive. Everybody's here. Jack, Ann, Dino...we're here, baby. With you. Come back to us."

And I opened my eyes and I saw his face and the sun rose in my eyes.

TERRY

We slept like babies. Why do they say that? Babies always wake up and cry. Maybe we did.

I was lying there in the morning watching her sleep, hearing her breathe. You have no idea how precious things are until you think they are gone. I learnt that before when we were apart; this time the call was too close and the fear was there from the beginning. I now know why I've lived such a solitary life. I lived it because it's easier not to give yourself away to someone else; you take no chances, you can't be hurt. Now I can.

The events of the evening before flashed across my mind. The moment her eyes flickered open and how she looked at me. The paramedics asking me fucking stupid questions and all she could do was weep. It's all I could do, too. I took her to the bathroom and peeled off the shirt, saturated in blood - threw it into a waste bin. She stood there shivering in the warm night; I stripped off and used my body to keep her warm, backed her gently into the shower and washed the blood from her. It was matted in her hair; thick arterial blood, brain matter; she closed her eyes and shuddered. She whispered "Wash me down there. Where he touched me. I feel so dirty." I did, almost afraid to touch her myself in case it hurt or frightened her.

"What did he do?" I needed to know; the cops would require it and I was washing away evidence.

"He touched me."

"Did he penetrate you?"

"Yes. And then I shot him. Dead."

She leaned back against my chest and I held her - what else can you do or say to take that image away? I've killed a lot of people. Each one takes its toll. If I were frank, I'd have to say I haven't got the taste for it. Maximus would not feel as I do. He can do such things without remorse. He is a killer with a fatalism born of his time. I am not, by nature. I was once a dreamer who had romantic ideas and principles and a desire to see the world. How did I get from A to Z in my life? It just happened. But I understand how she felt; it is how it makes me feel. I just know better how to hide my self-disgust.

There was a short interview with some DOA guys but they didn't push her; she was unresponsive and weepy, clinging to me, all spent and used up. Even they could see she needed time to deal with it. Tomorrow, they said, but soon, before she forgets. Forgets? This will stay with her forever. The nightmares always do.

I took her back to the Windsor Court, a different suite. She looked at it and said. "It's the wrong one."

I smiled. "You don't want to go back to the other one, honey."

"The other one was the wrong way round. This is better."

She was rambling but making a sort of Uma - sense. Sometimes you simply have to go with the flow.

I tried to make her eat but she shook her head. I ordered a light meal and fed her but after a few mouthfuls she refused to open her mouth, like a naughty child. Then she smiled at herself. I could feel the rigid tension in her easing away little bit by little bit.

"I'm tired, Terry. So tired. I can't keep my eyes open." We lay down beside each other beneath the covers and I hushed her until she fell asleep. I sat back on the headboard and lit a cigarette. Sleep didn't come easily to me. I was still pumped up with adrenalin and emotion. There was also the acceptance that I had almost failed them. I had acted unwisely and then failed to make it count. Two major errors. Enough for serious misconduct had I still been a soldier. Endangered the lives of the others on my team; allowed personal grudges to interfere with the carrying out of my duty. What was there to learn from that? I smiled to myself as I smoked and kept watch over her. I'm a bloody man not a machine - it's about time I realized it.

I woke up in the early morning and realized that we had slept deeply- I don't remember when I had finally gotten off. She was still dreaming, her eyelids beginning to flicker; I knew she was not far from waking.

Sunlight poured in and I took a deep breath, a new day. It felt good. It felt more than good. It felt like every good thing that had ever happened in my life was here and now. I hope I always remember how I felt that morning.

She stirred and rolled back, her hair all mussed up, stretching and yawning, her sleepy kitten look, my sweet little girl. I almost didn't want her to wake up; I knew that consciousness would bring back the haunting memories.

"What time is it?" Her voice startled me.

"About eight."

"That was a long sleep."

"You needed it. How you feeling?"

"Don't know. Groggy. Hungry. Better, I think." She threw the covers away and padded to the bathroom, staggering slightly as if punch drunk. When she returned, she climbed back into bed and held me. "I will be all right. I just need time. I keep thinking about it. I can't stop."

"You killed somebody. Even if you had to, it isn't an easy thing for anyone to rationalize."

"No, I don't mean that. Oh, I feel sick at what I did, but I'd do it again. For you and the others...I thought you were dead. I can't explain how much I wanted to kill him. But I can't stop thinking about when he touched me. I'm ashamed that I let him do that. I should have just gone for the gun. I shouldn't have used my body. That's like a whore."

The tears came again; it occurred to me how little men understand how women feel. To me she had done the wise thing - made sure there was no chance of missing him, drawn him into losing his guard - what better way than to have him in her? How can a man think rationally then? And yet that was worrying her most - or was she merely fixating on that one act because she had no way of dealing with the other?

"It was all you could do. It was the best thing to do. You would not be here now if you'd tried to shoot him. Uma...he took me. If Jack hadn't arrived he'd have killed me. Raul was the real McCoy - a real killer. He would have had you in an instant had you tried to pull a gun on him."

"Jack saved you? Raul took you? I always thought you were invincible."

"Well, I'm not. And that's the truth."

"Terry, touch me." I stroked her face and brushed away her tears. "No, I mean touch me, sexually. Make love to me."

I pulled away, a little surprised, maybe even shocked. I realized that I couldn't; she'd been hurt too much. It would be like abuse. "It's too soon. Leave it a few days until you're stronger." She ran her hands down my naked body and held my cock - it didn't respond. I shrugged, embarrassed, another failure.

"Uma, I can't. I'm sorry. I don't know why." I sat up and swung my legs out of bed, reaching for the inevitable cigarette. She knelt up behind me and pulled it from my mouth. I felt her breath on my ear as she whispered.

"I sent you away knowing that I might never see you again. The last man to love me was not you. You know that. And then Raul touched me. Take me back, Terry. I need you to take me back and drive his memory away. I don't want to remember how he felt."

Her words hit me like a concrete block. The last person to love me. "I have to tell you something...I can't keep it from you..."

Her finger closed my lips. "No. Not now. After. This is between you and me. I want you Terry and I believe you want me. Turn round. Love me...love me until it hurts."

I turned and saw her there, wide-eyed and loving me. My heart swelled. She knew. She'd always known - I am transparent to her. I heard a sob from deep inside me and I fell on to her and loved her. I wanted to be gentle; I didn't want to frighten her but I don't think I was able to hold back once the floodgate was open. Nor was she. We feasted on each other, the Last Supper we thought we might never have. She lay before me in some kind of ecstasy, her body limp but offering. I took her in my hands and pulled her up from the bed, she arched back, lithe and pliable, undulating and wild, crying my name, celebrating her freedom from the darkness around her. Her body felt like a rag doll, I should have been ashamed, but I was not. I drove myself into her again and again. We were alive and we could love until it hurt.

A long time later, still lying there, she asked me to tell her. I did. I kept nothing back but what I owed to Ann to keep silent. And then she told me how she really felt about Maximus; it is the first time that we have acknowledged his name in anything but embarrassed whispers. And so we slotted the last stone in place and built our castle. It is strong and high; it towers above the world. Inside it is a refuge for the two of us alone; no one will breach it when we stand together. But the door is open and we will go freely about the world. We have our friends. We have our lovers. It is a blessed existence. Elysium.

I was packing in the suite- tonight we were flying back to New York for a few days and then home to London. Jack and Terry were out playing golf. Jack was new to the game but I suspected he might be a pretty useful player. Terry hates to lose. It would be more like war games on the links.

Ann and I were meeting for tea in half an hour. For once I would be on time. Then the door bell rang, must be Housekeeping. I thought. I ran over to answer it and opened the door. It wasn't Housekeeping.

"Dino!" He stood there smiling, one hand on the wall, another on his hip.

"Got a minute?"

I nodded and brought him in. He looked around the suite and I wondered what he was thinking. "Can I get you a drink?"

He shook his head. "I came ...look, I'm on my way to the airport. I wanted to say goodbye."

"Terry's out with Jack..."

"I know. I came to say goodbye to you. Alone. You understand me?"

I looked down at my feet and blushed. "We need to talk, don't we?"

"Yeah, baby, we need to talk. Terry knows."

"I know. Was he angry with you?"

"I don't know. I don't think so. We didn't talk about it. We won't ever talk about it. What did he say to you?"

I shrugged. "Something about all bets were off that night. There'll never be another night like that..."

"That's the truth. And there won't be, Uma. Ever. If I touched you again, he'd kill me for sure. And I would fucking deserve it. But, I'm not going to say I'm sorry, because I'm not. It's a good memory. One of the few good ones of the past week. I will hold it close to my heart, always. I just wanted for you to know that. I didn't do it lightly."

He turned to go. I ran after him. "Stop!" Dino spun round on his heel, that smart assed grin on his face, about to say something funny, hiding what he was really feeling already.

"I'm not sorry. I never was. I might be crazy but I'm not a fool. You're a good man and I've always wanted you. I resisted temptation for Terry's sake before but I wasn't strong enough that night. You are right- it will never happen again. But thanks for the memory. It got me through that night and I will never forget it. However, I will also not speak of it again. From now on, we're just pals, Dino. Good pals... Shake on it?"

He took my hand and raised it to his lips to kiss. I flung my arms around his neck and he swung me round. "You feel so good, baby..." he murmured and then he set me down.

"Hasta luego, hermana?" 

I grinned. So did he. My good pal, Dino.

Which is why I was late. The gods have it in for me, honestly they do. Ann would be furious. 

Ann was furious.

"Where the hell have you been? Can't you even tell the time? I have never met anyone as bad as you..."

"Keep your hair on! I have an excuse. Don't roll your eyes like that. A really good excuse. I had to say goodbye to Dino."

"Oh."

"And don't say 'oh' like that. We just said goodbye - don't start having erotic fantasies- nothing happened. End of story. But I couldn't just throw him out, could I? What's to eat? Call those, scones? And this tea's like monkey piss. I'm going to have to have something stronger..."

"I'm on sherry."

"Sherry? You sound like my grandma! I'm having a martini."

"Uma, it's only four o'clock."

"Who gives a fuck? Got to be five o'clock somewhere in the world. Jesus, these sandwiches are tasteless!"

"Didn't stop you eating the stack. Of course, you are having to slum it in the States! We all know how wonderful British cuisine is."

"We know how to make a cup of tea and a sarnie, love." I munched on a sandwich and looked at Ann.  "I must say, green suits you...I look awful in it." Ann had on a pale green sun dress.

"You looked amazing in that dress the other night - I can't wear white. I'm just sorry that Jack didn't see me in the dress. He would have so liked the way my boobs looked."

"Well, I'm sure you can wear it again."

"Don't think so. Bad memories in the end."

"Not all bad, hey?

"No. Not all bad.

"See- every cloud...you know?

"Sure. That's true. It has brought us all closer, I think

"I didn't really mean us all, Ann. I mean it has brought us all together - no doubt about that - but I mean you and Terry. Let's not dance about, Ann. I've had enough of that."

She seemed to squirm in her seat and looked unsure how to answer. Was I simply fishing?

"Well, at least we can now be in the same room"

"Ann - I know. Please. Don't run and hide!"

She breathed out and looked away, embarrassed. "We didn't plan to ... Wait. What do you know? And am I about ready to die? If so, can I have a moment to write out my last will and testament?

"Hey- do I look in killer mode? Left my gun at home anyway. God, that was a sick joke. I'm sorry." But we both laughed, an icebreaker.

"There is an art to asking questions to get the answers you want. So let me put it to you plainly - what has Terry told you about any time we spent alone together?"

She was putting me on the spot; I wanted to be truthful. "I think he told me all I needed to know. Look, he would never say inappropriate things about you...I wouldn't want to hear them...but I know you faked it.  I mean... you faked the porno act. You made it for real."

"Oh. But it wasn't what it may appear. We weren't trying to take advantage ... it just happened. Look, I want to be honest with you. Okay? But I would never want to hurt you. Tell me how much do you want to know? Is it enough for me to say that I have come to realize how much I love him still? And that I can see he loves me? And that it is far too powerful for us to not figure out a way to forgive each other for what happened before?"

"Ann- I never thought of it as taking advantage! It's what I wanted for both of you! I hated how you treated him; I knew how it made him feel. OK- he did a wrong thing but we all made mistakes...I know he loves you. You're special to him. He needs you. I just want him to be happy. Nothing has ever changed in the way he feels about you. Don't you know that? He isn't that kind of man. We are not in competition, this is not a contest. How he feels about me is different and it will never change either. Honesty? You and him - you could never be a partnership. There's something missing. But you will always be lovers and special in each other's hearts. I know how that feels. Because I have that. too.

"I think you've always understood this thing better than I ever did. But it's so freeing to say it. To believe it. We do have something special. And for a change, I do know it. I don't doubt his love anymore. Jack's probably been more aware than I was too. But, since we're sharing? About Maximus?"

I grimaced a little, still unused to speaking of him to anyone - but I wasn't going to chicken out with Ann.

"I won't give him up. I can't. Terry knows. He understands. If we don't face it, it will destroy us - hiding is dangerous if you hide from yourself. Things never really go away. Max and I are the world's strangest couple but it works when we're together. I think we're good for each other. He calms me down and I loosen him up. Crazy? But he isn't Terry and never will be. I can't live with Max. Terry barely copes with me. You just know, Ann. In this World, you just know - if you let yourself know. Just go on instinct and emotion - the things we mistrust most of all these days. Everything is upside down but it works. You know it does...you left, but you hated being on the outside. Once you're in, you're in. You have to play by a new set of rules...am I making sense or just rambling again?"

"Actually, I have always liked it when you ramble. It always makes sense. You do make sense. And I do know what you mean. Shall I tell you something I've never told anyone? Even my diary?

I grinned and nudged her conspiratorially "Go on...I love secrets."

"When I first came into this world, I assumed it was just a lark. That I'd romp around with the Brothers. But that it would never be serious. Just sex for a while. And that I was doing it while I was biding my time waiting for some man to walk into my life. Another man. Not a Brother. So in the beginning? I kept thinking I had to set boundaries. Only so much of me was involved in this world. But then when I went back in the Portal, I realized, I'd left my heart and soul back here. And that the man I'd been waiting for was the Brothers. There. See? I make no more sense than you, do I?"

"You make all the sense in the world. That is it exactly. They are the man we have been waiting for. But one of them is all of them for us. Each one of us finds the true partner who seems like everything the others are for us, all rolled into one. Isn't that so? Don't you love it when you recognise something that reminds you of another Brother? And yet you still know how different they are, how unique...I can't describe it any better. Thank you for telling me your secret. I owe you mine. I believed that I could never find a man to satisfy me, so I settled for playing the field. Playing the field is fun but it isn't life. Life is taking the chance and throwing your lot in with one man. We have both of those worlds. Are we lucky girls or what?"

"Do you have any idea how many women would kill to be where we are? I mean, really. We have these incredible men, we get to fall ape-shit in love with that one that is our home; so many of us also have that other one that is incredibly important ... and yet we also have all these others. We can make our every fantasy come true. Just figure out the man we can have it with and go for it. And don't tell me one of the reasons we weren't among the chosen wasn't because we didn't have good imaginations. I mean, look at you. Foiling a kidnapping with nothing but your fantasy."

"The power of imagination, Ann, my dear, as Jack would say...is mightier than the sword." We both giggled at another likely Jack misquote. "I reckon I should get a job with T and O now - but they rejected my application. The boss said I wouldn't even make the filing dept. Said I was only fit for UBC service- you know Under the Bed covers. He is such a chauvinist. "

"Maybe we could train some of their operatives?" Ann suggested.

I snorted. "Terry would have a heart attack. Lesson 1: Dress like a tart, get drunk, say the first the first thing that comes into your head..."

"...Think on your feet, act on your ass, disobey every order given,..."

"Always let your phone battery die, never remember to recharge..."

"Charge all your clothes to the company, run up an expense account..."

"Shag the boss..."

"Both of them actually..."

"Don't mention that, Ann...I only have nine lives."

"Sorry, thoughtless of me. It shall not be mentioned."

"But it was fun... God, I can't believe I said that!" I threw down the rest of my Martini.

"Well....yeah! We are talking Dino here!" Another fit of laughter possessed us.

"Well, so you can imagine Tezza's face when I suggested I might have a contribution to make to the Company. The phrases 'my dead body' and 'not over' were mentioned."

"Could you see his face? You know that look he gets?"

"Do I ever? Queen Victoria. Just sucked on a lemon. Good job he's gorgeous."

"They looked good that night, didn't they?"

"They sure did."

"We did, too."

"Who could blame us?"

"No one could."

"We were tarts, after all. You know, Ann - we never got paid for that. I think I'll bill the office- 'For sexual services rendered'. Shari, his secretary. will burst a blood vessel. She thinks Terry is Rhett Butler."

"I forgot. We were owed a cool million. I had it on tape."

"I'd settle for anything at the moment. I'm broke."

"I'd settle for the $100 you owe me."

"You tight git!"

"Hey. Who has the credit card here? Best not piss off your only meal ticket. I notice Mr. Thorne is not around to pick up your bills. You still owe me $100."

"What do you expect me to do? Go stand on a street corner? Mind you - wouldn't take me long."

"How quick can you do fifty guys?"

"You cow!"

"I thought I was paying you a compliment."

"Why cos you do it for $1 a go?

"You bitch!"

"Hey...maybe I don't need a street corner... reckon one of those dudes is good for a hundred bucks...? See, those two coming in."

Across the room we spied Terry and Jack strolling over. Jack was smiling and rolling along in his usual fashion with Terry in his wake, eyes sweeping the room and his sombre 'don't fuck with me, mate,' look on his face. Bet he lost the match.

"Those guys? Mmmmm. I might pay them the $100."

"You'd have to pay them and it would cost you more than that."

"You ... you ... Christ...you are such a rude bitch!"

"Thank you. I aim to please. Let's see if they bite."

"Okay then. Dare you. Which one you want as your mark?"

"The blond looks like he'd be a lot of fun."

"He does, doesn't he? Christ. Look at the way he fills out those breeches...I mean, yes, he looks ripe for the pickings... the dark haired one looks like a bit of a stiff."

"You better have Blondie then...I'll take Mr. Cool. The stiffer the better for me, luvvie."

"Yes, let's see you warm him up. See if you're woman enough."

"I think you just threw down the gauntlet and I just picked it up."

"I think you just dropped your panties."

"Not wearing any. Shush, here they come. Hello lads, what can we do you for?"

"Screaming Orgasm, perhaps" Ann added with a pout.

"Reckon you're up for it, boys?" Jack and Terry stood listening, one bemused the other smirking.

"Long Screw Up Against The Wall?"  Terry asked.

"Ah but - have you got a big enough screwdriver, sweetie?"

"...What a pleasant surprise. Working girls on a hot day." Terry grinned and sat down next to me, leaning in.

"So how about it, boys? Buy some working girls a cool one?" Ann teased.

"It is quite hot outside, isn't it?" Jack said and sat down next to Ann.

"Nowhere near as hot as you, sweetie." Ann cooed down his ear; he looked across confused.

"It's quite hot inside too, love. You should feel my knickers."

"Thought you weren't wearing any, slut?"

"Calm down ladies, no mudwrestling," Terry added running his arm round my shoulder.

"That your fantasy, handsome? Because you know, if the price is right ..." Ann stuck her tongue between her teeth and purred. It was impressive. Cooing and purring.

Jack smiled at her. "I do believe these drinks are damnably expensive."

"No where near as expensive as Uma." Ann pointed out.

"Hey, a girl's got to eat! And, I love to eat...meat..." My turn to lick my lips and run my hand up Terry's thigh.

"$2 and she's yours," Ann, the pimp, started dealing.

"Hey! It's a joke, love- take no notice of her"

"You just better start earning that $100 you owe me. Reckon there's some fantasy worth that much to either of these gentlemen?

"What's it to be then, boys...queue starts here."

"Fantasy, my dear?" Jack looked from one to the other. "Am I to understand that you ladies earn your living by entertaining sailors visiting port?"

"You got it, Blondie. I want to be the woman of your dreams...for the small matter of a fee. That's if you boys can ...rise to the occasion."

Jack suddenly clued in to the conversation. "Rise? I most certainly can...like the proverbial oak, my dear...little acorns grow into...something or other..."

"Something mighty?" Ann ventured.

"Big woodies, Jack?" Terry added, barely concealing his amusement.

"Let me check," said Ann, cupping Jack's ample groin. "Why, I do believe I smoke his meaning now. Quite a mighty oak, if I do say so myself."

"What about you, honey? You going to let your friend outdo you?" I pouted at Terry who took my hand and clamped it on his own package."

"You asking me for a reference? I keep it here - in my pants."

"Can we see it?" Ann threw over.

"Now we could be talking private room here, baby..." Terry replied, his eyes flashing.

"I dunno, Uma. He doesn't look very honorable. Dunno you should take a chance on a private room with a guy like him.

"Fine with me but I want to see the colour of your money first, love."

"How much then?"

"Told you, 100 bucks."

"For you? Too much, love.  I got a bird at home who'll give me the works for free. $20 tops."

"You must be joking. I wouldn't give it a jerk for 20. And it's never free love - bet she costs you more than 100 bucks a day."

"Second thoughts, you could be right. Fine. But just what is it you think you can do that is worth $100 to me?"

"Try me out and you'll know. Take a chance- if you've got the guts."

"Are you seriously daring me, sweetheart?"

"Well...yeah!"

"OK, you asked for it. We make it my fantasy. Whatever I want. And I give you the $100?"

"Suits me...whatever you desire, lover...but money first, eh?"

"What kind of whore are you, Uma? Do it first, then the money. Christ. I shoulda known better than to pal around with a rank amateur. Here. Let me show you how it's done..." Ann spoke in a stage whisper.

"He's dodgy, he'll eat and run, I know the type..." I replied behind my hand.

"Blondie? Your room or mine? Whatever you want. I'll give you the first taste for free cuz you're so cute. What do you say?" Ann asked; Jack raised his eyes and shook his head with amusement.

Terry turned to me and said " See? There's a proper negotiation. Both sides win."

"I prefer one side wins - but that's just me."

"Yeah, I'm quite familiar with your likes and dislikes..."

"You mean I've done you before? You couldn't have made much of an impression - the price just went up."

"No, love, you're not playing that game. We agreed to the $100. On the other hand, maybe it's best we call it off. I fear you'd never be able to handle my fantasy. For any amount of money. I'm a big guy...quite a lot for you to handle, love."

"Hold on...hold on...I can take you any day ...why, what is this fantasy?

"First we agree on the price."

"OK, fixed price - unless Blondie is interested....might give him a discount..." I blew a kiss to Jack.

"Simple fantasy - one night. Your mouth shut."

"You might have to fill it with something then..."

"That goes without saying, love."

"Deal." I stood up and held out my hand to Terry who grinned and licked his lips.

"Blondie, mate. You're on your own."

"I think I would like to sample some of the fine dainties here. Perhaps I could order tea first - I feel a bit peckish?

"Of course, sweetie. But ... just in case you needed to know this? I am wearing no panties. And I have a new bra on." Jack exhaled and cleared his throat.

"Christ, mate...do you ever think of anything else but food?" Terry laughed as he stood up to leave.

"Well, sir...as they say in the old adage...hmmm, how does it go? Ah yes...abstinence makes the cock grow fonder. Don't you agree, man?"