An addition to the series. The action takes place some six years after the previous story. Terry and Annie have two children and live in Canberra where he is a senior military advisor to the Australian government, back in the army with the rank of major. He is no longer involved in his previous line of work and has apparently settled to a peaceful domestic existence. Of course, things are about to change......

PART ONE

"Hiya, funny face. Where's your Mum?"

Zoe Thorne looked up from her painting and smiled at her father. "Upstairs. But I wouldn't go up there." She carried on with her work, her tongue hanging out of the side of her mouth with concentration.

Why? What's up?"

"She's shouting at Liam. She's in a real crabby mood, Dad."

"What's he done this time?"

Zoe shrugged. "Dunno. But he's in big trouble."

Terry Thorne smiled and ran up the stairs, pulling off his tie. Liam was always in trouble. He couldn't go from one room to another without some mischief occurring. At the top of the stairs he stopped and heard Annie's voice:

"You are the naughtiest boy I have ever met. I should smack your bottom. But lucky for you I don't believe in hitting children. However you are pushing me pretty close to changing my mind on that one, Liam Patrick Thorne. If your father finds out what you have done..."

"Don't...tell...Dad!" The little boy gasped. 

"That got to you, did it? Glad someone frightens you. I'm not so sure he'd be able to keep his hands off you. Your Dad doesn't always subscribe to my liberal principles..."

Terry looked into the room and surveyed the scene before him. Liam was standing before his mother in his bedroom. He was wearing baggy shorts and a vest top stained with food and dirt- it was impossible to keep the child clean. His thick dark blonde hair was long and mussed up, 'Annie really needs to get that cut off at his age', Terry thought. The boy's face was sombre and chastened, his bottom lip trembling. Liam had his big eyes turned on his mother and his long golden brown eyelashes were wet with the tears that he was struggling manfully to hold back. He was a tough little bugger but found it hard not to cry when his mother shouted at him. The sight of the four-year old boy, wriggling on his chubby brown legs, sucking his thumb and nervously playing with his dick through his shorts with the other hand almost made Terry laugh out loud. But he knew Annie would kill him if he did - she would reduce him later to the same quivering mass as Liam if he didn't back her up on this one. Terry didn't blame his son - any bloke would grab hold of his dick if Annie was giving him some verbal.

Composing his face and tilting his chin he strode in.

"What's all this then? You been messing about again, mate?"

Liam jumped and stared at his father. His face paled.

"Terry- take him out of my sight. I swear I will murder him one of these days. He would try the patience of a saint."

"What's he done?"  Terry asked. Liam gasped. Annie looked at her son, her face stern but her eyes melting at the sight of him. "I'd rather not say. Just keep him out of my way. Zoe has a swimming lesson at five- I'll take her- I need to get out of here."

"But I have a lesson too..." Liam wailed.

"No chance, mate. You are staying in your room." Annie retorted.

That was it. Liam burst out crying and stood there in the middle of the room sobbing with tears running down his face.

"Please... Mum... I'll be good..."

"No swimming for you and that's final. I'm off, Terry- see you later." Annie pecked her husband on the cheek and whispered. "Do not be soft on him!" and ran down the stairs.

"Want to talk about it, Liam, mate?" Liam shook his head. "That bad, eh?" The little boy nodded.

"You had supper?" Liam shook his head again. "Hungry?" Liam nodded again. "Okey dokey. I'll feed ya, bath ya and then it's bed. I want you tucked up and asleep before your Mum gets back. No arguments- right? No running around, asking for drinks, playing with toys, getting up for a wee - and definitely no stories. You are in the dog house tonight, mate."

Liam sniffed and smeared his runny nose all over his face with the back of his hand. He continued to sob plaintively. "Sort yourself out, mate. You sound like a big girl. You want to mess about, you better learn to take the punishment!" Terry took his hand and dragged him to the bathroom where he roughly wiped his son's face on a washcloth. He noticed the limpid eyes and the sad little face looking up at him and felt a surge of emotion inside him. Liam was a monkey but he simply couldn't help himself. Unlike Zoe, who was as devious as her mother, Liam just never saw it coming. He got an idea in his head and acted on it without a thought. His mental processes were written across his face as clear as day. Terry realised that he once been a little boy like that and wondered when life had begun to teach him to hide behind the mask. He had an overwhelming wish that Liam never had to learn that skill.

Down in the kitchen later, they ate together at the table and Liam had recovered some of his usual good humour. Food always helped him; Liam could shovel away more food than an average manual worker already- one of the worst punishments you could give him was to send him to bed without his supper.

"Dad?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I have skate board?"

"You'll have to ask your Mum. And I wouldn't ask her at the moment, mate."

"She said I had to ask you."

"I'll have a word with her."

"She said you have to be five."

"Well, there's your answer then."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you have to be five?"

"So you're big enough not to fall off."

"But Zoe's five."

"Yeah, mate, what's your point?"

"I'm bigger'n her."

Terry couldn't argue with that. Liam was already taller and substantially broader than his sister and had physical skills way beyond most of his peers. He wore clothes for a six year old and that was half the problem- his body was too big and strong for his four year old brain; he was like a bull in a china shop. It's funny how you expect a big kid to act more sensibly even if he's only a baby really.

"Yeah, mate, but you're dafter. She's got more sense. You know you'd break your neck or destroy the house. I'll talk to your Mum when she's calmed down. But don't count on it, mate."

When the girls arrived back, the house was quiet. Terry was working in the study and Liam was fast asleep. Annie tiptoed in and knelt by the little boy's bed watching him sleep. She stroked back the thick hair and reached over to kiss his rosebud mouth and he wrinkled his nose in his sleep, cuddling his worn Teddy in his arms. A lump rose in her throat as she looked at him. He was so precious and so infuriating all at the same time. Just like all men. 'God, will he break some hearts before someone nails him down,' Annie thought with a smile.

Downstairs, Zoe was in full flow in the study: "... Charlotte got her badge, too but she cheated. She didn't touch the bottom and they didn't notice. They asked her and she told a fib. I don't think that's fair, do you? I'm a much better swimmer than her and now we're still in the same group even though she can't get to the bottom because she's too fat...."

Terry let her ramble on, his mind mostly on the screen before him. He had mastered the art of saying 'yes' every few sentences and that seemed to keep her happy. It worked with Annie anyway.

"Dad, are you listening?"

"Yes, princess."

"What did I say then?" Fortunately Annie came in at that moment and saved him.

"Eaten? We had a bite at the club." Terry nodded. "How did you get the monster to sleep?"

"He just caved in. I think he realised he was beaten. He seemed relieved to go up actually. What did he do?"

"Pulled the wipers off my car."

"What? Your new car? You've only had it a week! What the f... hell did he do that for?"

Annie raised both hands up. "You tell me how the minds of little boys work! He just climbed up on the bonnet and snapped them off. It was sheer vandalism, Terry. They couldn't believe it when I rang the garage. They said they were hard to shift with tools. He must be strong."

"He's a bloody animal. I'd have skinned his backside if I'd have known." Terry threatened.

"He just walked into the kitchen with them in his hand and said. ' Mum, they come off!'  He just doesn't seem to have any sense of right or wrong. Sometimes I don't know what to do with him. He starts school soon- what will he do there? I bet they expel him!"

"School- that's probably what he needs. He's bored at home with you all day. He needs some discipline."

"Can we send him to boot camp?" Annie laughed. "He's so adorable, though. Good job really. He'd be dead by now if he didn't have those eyes. When he flutters his lashes at me, I just give in. He gets that from you, you know."

"Me? I don't flutter my eyelashes."

"Course you do. How d'you think you got me?" Terry reached out and pulled her onto his knee.

"Stop that, you two! Wait until I'm in bed. It's disgusting." Zoe was eyeing them with disapproval. She had little patience with adults who embarrassed her.

Later Annie ran downstairs and sighed gratefully. Kids asleep, she was refreshed by a shower and now had a chance to chill out before bedtime. The study was in darkness; Terry must have finished working so she made her way to the lounge. The lights were low and he was reading by lamplight. Annie observed him before he realised that she was there. He never failed to make her heart miss a beat, even after all this time. Suddenly he raised his eyes and smiled and it was as if all the years disappeared and she was back in London and she saw his eyes for the first time and was smitten. Hopelessly.

"What are you reading?"

"Jane's Defence Weekly," he admitted ruefully.

Annie shook her head. "fashion magazine for overgrown boy scouts?"

"Have to keep up, love. I'm a bloody defence expert."

"What the latest commando is toting this season? Nerve gas to match any outfit, grenades that leave no visible bulge, weapons of mass destruction that no country can afford to be without..."

"Very funny. Don't see you complaining when you spend the wages of sin I earn. Come here."

Annie walked over to the easy chair where he was sitting. He threw down the magazine and ran his hands down the short broderie anglaise slip she was wearing, cupping her buttocks through the flimsy material. She heard his breathing change when he felt her naked cheeks and his hands immediately slipped beneath the hem, up the outside of her thighs and settled on the bare flesh above.

"You forgot something?" He remarked as he pulled back a little and lifted the dress above her waist.

"I never forget anything, honey. I remember it all." Annie took his hand and placed it between her legs. "I don't think you've forgotten anything either." Her voice was suddenly husky and full of desire.

Terry lowered her onto his knee and pulled her face to his. Her lips tasted minty and her hair smelled of some fresh citrus fragrance. He played with her top lip between his teeth as she unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it from his pants. Holding her head in his hands, he thrust his tongue more deeply into her mouth, feeling the slight exhalation of air that his sudden movement forced from her throat and the corresponding pressure she exerted on his probing tongue.

His cock was pressing against the warmth of her nakedness and she rocked herself against him as they kissed. "Let's do it here, Terry. I don't want long and slow. I want a bit of rough. Just give it to me, baby."

She always sensed his mood. Annie fumbled with his zip and seized upon his hardness, rubbing herself along her body to wet him and then lowering herself upon him, whimpering as he filled her. Her eyes were half closed and she arched her back, pressing her breasts against his face and contracting her inner muscles hard as she rose and fell around his shaft.

Terry nuzzled her nipples through the light fabric and lowered his hand to find the gap between their bodies. As she rose from him, he found her nub and began to stroke it slowly in time to her rhythm; Annie groaned and tightened her vagina against him instinctively.

"I want you to do me really hard, Terry. I want some dirty sex..." she moaned into his ear.

"Mum...?" They froze. Terry looked over Annie's shoulder and saw his son standing a few feet away from them, rubbing his eyes. How long had he been there?

He held Annie by the waist and smoothed down her slip. She looked at him with horror, a question in her eyes. "I don't know," he whispered in answer. "Just lift up and turn round. I'll sort myself out behind your back."

Annie raised herself slightly and they both gasped. She twisted round on his knee and sat there, legs akimbo, holding out her arms to her son.

"What is it, sweetie?" She heard Terry zip up his fly.

"Mum. What you doing?" Terry and Annie paused. It was the question every parent fears.

"I'm kissing Daddy, Liam."

"Oh." He accepted her answer and she breathed a sigh of relief. "Mummy, I'm sorry. I just wanted to see how far it would go." Liam began to cry again and Annie slipped onto the floor beside him, cradling him in her arms.

"You have to think first before you do things. You are a very strong boy. But I'm glad you said sorry. That's a very grown up thing to do, Liam. It takes a lot of courage to do that. Let's go back upstairs and put you to bed. Tomorrow we'll sort it all out and start again. OK?"

"Mum?" Liam asked as they hugged and she wiped his tearstained face."Can I have a skate board?" Terry and Annie burst out laughing and Liam stared at them, unsure what was so funny. Terry swung his son up in his arms and they all went upstairs together.

"Wanted to see how far it could go?" Terry remarked as they left his room some minutes later. He threw his arm around Annie's shoulder and pulled her against him. "I can understand that. It's what all boys want to know. In fact, I think we should go to bed and just check that one out right now, love" he murmured in her ear.

"Just make sure you lock the bloody door, sexy!" Annie chuckled.

PART TWO

The doorbell rang. It was five thirty and Annie was in the middle of preparing dinner. 'Bloody hell! If it's a fucking salesman, I'll blast him...' she thought.

"Zoe- get the door!"

She heard her daughter sigh, annoyed at having to drag herself from some cartoon she was watching, and open the door. Suddenly a scream: "Harry!"

Annie ran through. Harry was standing there at the door with a blonde girl in tow. They both had backpacks and looked as if they hadn't washed for a few weeks.

"My God, Harry, why didn't you call?"

Harry laughed. "Thought I surprise you. Just got in from Thailand. Oh, meet Amanda. We...er... sort of met up on the Khao San Road and travelled around a bit. I didn't think you'd mind if I brought her over. Mandy - this is my step mother, Annie, and my little sister, Zoe. Mandy's from Sydney."

Suddenly a cannonball hit Harry with a thud.

"Watch it, Liam! And this is my brother Liam," Harry grinned with Liam hanging off his neck.

"Liam. Get down!  Hi, Amanda, pleased to meet you. 'Course you can bring a friend! Come in- what do you want first- food, drink, sleep...?"

"Shower!" Both Harry and Amanda shouted at once. 

"Follow me!" Annie led the young couple upstairs and showed Amanda to the guest room and sorted her out with a towel.

"Harry- use our bathroom. No need to wait. You know where the towels are."

Pulling the children downstairs to give them some peace, Annie set out their supper and began to scratch her head about what she was going to do to make the food stretch to include two hungry twenty year olds. "Zoe, I'm just going out to the freezer to grab something. Give me a shout if you need me..."

Terry swung the car round to pull into the driveway nearly hitting the complete room set out on the path. They had been playing house again. He backed out onto the road and parked outside. Running into the kitchen where his two children were eating, he said,

"Get that mess cleared as soon as you've finished. I nearly ran over that bloody Wendy house!"

He was not in the mood tonight. The day had been shit, it was 40 degrees plus in the shade and he was hot, tired and wanted a shower, some food and a beer. Dragging off his tie and shirt, he took the stairs two at a time and made for the bathroom. A shower. Quick. By the time he hit the bathroom he was already in his shorts. The shower was running - great.  Annie must be in it- quick fuck while the kids were eating. That might improve his mood.

Pulling open the shower door, even his sterling control was severely tested. His eldest son was pumping into a naked girl from behind, his hands resting on her slender brown hips.

"What the fuck...?"

Harry couldn't stop- he came loudly at the same moment as his partner clawed at the tiles and announced her orgasm with a scream. They rested there panting for a few seconds; Terry was still reeling from the shock.

"Hi, Dad. Could you give us a minute?" Harry nervously muttered.

Terry stepped back into the bedroom and replaced his shirt and pants. Retracing his steps down the stairs, he returned to the kitchen and helped himself to a cold beer. Annie entered from the utility room.

"Hi, sweetie. Didn't hear the car." She leaned over and kissed his cheek. 

"Guess who just turned up?"

"Harry?" Terry answered in a snappish tone.

"Yes? How did you know? Trust you to clock the backpacks in the hall!"

"Not exactly. It was the bare bums in the shower that gave it away," he answered tartly.

"You didn't walk in on Harry did you? Good job I didn't put the girlfriend in our shower!" Annie giggled.

Terry dropped his voice and nodded to Annie to come nearer.

"I just walked in on Harry and some little piece fucking in our shower."

"WHAT?" Annie hooted.  "Has he got some bottle or what? No doubts who he takes after then, is there?"

"This is not funny. I'll rip his fucking head off when he gets down. What if one of the kids had walked in?"

"Gets down? Still at it are they?" Annie was still laughing. "Woo hoo! I love twenty - year old men! Don't be such a hypocrite- you're only jealous!"

Terry swore under his breath and walked out to the lounge throwing himself in front of the television. Minutes later, Harry walked in wearing a pair of cut-offs, his long blonde curls still damp.

"Er, Dad, I'm sorry about that."

Terry indicated they should go through into the garden. "Sorry?  You think that makes it OK? There are two little kids in this house- say they'd seen you? In my fucking bathroom? Why don't you just go and fuck in my bed next time?"

"Come on, Dad. We just got carried away. Don't be such a dick! Like you don't do it with two kids in the house? Seems to me I've heard you and Annie at it often enough..."

"What? Who the fuck do you think you are? I'm a grown man with a wife- you are a kid who should have the good sense to keep your sex life private and out of your own home. And you better have used something..."

"Not ready to be a grandfather yet?  Don't worry- Mandy's on the pill. Do you think I'm as stupid as you and Mum?" Harry faced his father up; his green eyes glinting with fury.

"You arrogant little bastard..." Terry was about as close to hitting Harry as he had ever been to hitting anyone in his life without stopping. Annie stepped between them.

"Harry- go upstairs. Now!" Harry was breathing in short gasps and she had to push him gently to break the eye lock between father and son. Reluctantly he turned and went back into the house. Annie looked back at Terry who was leaning one hand against the wall and trying to regain his composure.

"What is your problem? When did you suddenly become the moral majority? He's twenty and he's got a girlfriend. So, they sneaked a bit when they thought our backs were turned - big deal. You should be laughing about it, not treating him like some degenerate. I thought you were going to smack him one then..."

"I fucking well nearly did. Do you know what he said?"

"No, but I expect it was an insult. Neither of you were behaving in a pleasant manner towards each other. What is it with men and their sons? Do you feel you are in competition? Does it make you feel threatened to have a younger more sexually active man in the house? Like lions in a pride? Jesus- I always knew you were a Neanderthal but this really takes the biscuit!"

Terry spun round. "So I'm the bad guy now? I can't fucking believe you at times! He's my son and nothing to do with you - so fucking butt out will you?"

"Don't you dare speak to me like that! I suggest you get in that shower yourself and turn it on cold for a very long time. Because if you don't calm down, mate, you'll be sleeping somewhere else tonight - and that's a promise!"

Annie stormed back into the house and returned to the kitchen, slamming plates into the dishwasher. Zoe and Liam sat round-eyed, neither saying anything. Suddenly Zoe burst into tears.

"Are you and Daddy getting a divorce?" Annie was astonished. She knelt down by her daughter's chair.

"What was that? A divorce? Who told you about divorce? Sweetie, of course not."

"But you and Daddy were fighting." She was sobbing and clinging on to Annie's neck.

"You and Liam fight but you make friends afterwards. Everyone quarrels sometimes, darling."

"But Daddy was saying nasty words to you!"

Annie breathed deeply. She forgot just how much his voice could carry when he raised it. "I know. He shouldn't have said them. But... it was just a silly quarrel."

"Why is Dad angry with Harry? What did he do?" Liam asked.

"Nothing you need worry about. Why don't you two go and watch TV for a while, while I clear up?" She gave them both a kiss and Zoe reluctantly peeled herself away from her mother. Several of her classmates had parents who were separated or divorced and Annie hadn't realised how much impact that had made on her daughter. She was only five and already becoming aware that life can be insecure. 'God, will I give him some stick over this," Annie promised herself.

Dinner was a restrained affair. Amanda had sidled down rather shamefaced and taken her place at the table next to Harry. Terry had nodded his head in some cursory greeting at Amanda and then eaten in silence and Annie was left trying to make small talk about Harry's holiday, which mostly drew only monosyllabic answers from the young pair. It was a relief when they had finished.

"Perhaps you would like to call your Mum, Harry? Let her know you're back safe and sound?" Annie was trying to give him a reason to leave the room.

"Yeah, maybe I'll ring your Mum. Keep her up to date on your progress." Terry snapped across the table. Harry shot him a look.

"I want to talk to you in private, Dad. Now." 

Annie inclined her head towards Amanda and the two women left the room.

In the kitchen, Annie poured Amanda a glass of wine and took one herself.

"OK. Let's talk. I'm sorry that was your first meeting with Terry. He's not usually like that. Not sure what's the matter with him really..." Annie wasn't sure what to say.

"don't blame him, Mrs. Thorne. We shouldn't have been there. It was my fault. I egged him on. He didn't want to. I just didn't expect anyone to come in. I'm really sorry. You must think I'm a little slapper..."

Annie grinned. "Of course I don't! Listen - we all have our moments. Harry's Dad had had more than his share of those so I would have expected him to be more modern about it. He sounded like some Victorian father..."

"My Dad would have killed us both. I think it's just hard for men to accept their kids are growing up. My Mum is much more easy about stuff like this- she encouraged me to go on the pill - my Dad would have a heart attack if he knew!"

"As long as you are being careful. But remember- it's not just about avoiding pregnancy these days. If you and Harry are having other partners you must use condoms as well. You do realise that, don't you?'

Amanda nodded. "We are a couple. I mean it's not serious but we are together and have been all summer. I don't screw around. He's just ... I really get on with him. He's a great bloke and he turns me on. Harry's really good with women. He is sort of gentle and yet knows how to take charge - do you know what I mean?"

"Yeah- sounds just like his Dad! Terry is a great guy too- you'll like him when you get to know him."

"Ialready do."

Annie looked at Amanda quizzically.  "Based on his performance this evening?"

Amanda blushed. "I didn't quite expect him to be such a fit bloke. You should see my Dad! Terry looks like a ... well, a guy I'd perve over, really. He's younger than I'd imagined and really good-looking. It's a bit embarrassing to think that if I had seen him in a club I'd have hoped he'd make a move!"

Annie laughed. "Typical- I'm lusting over twenty year olds and you've got the hots for the old guys!"

"I've always fancied a real man. You know, you kind of expect them to show you a few new experiences. Young guys can be a bit too selfish and don't have much control. I bet Terry... Christ, I can't say that to you!" Amanda suddenly exclaimed.

"Say what? That he could go all night? Depends on his mood. Mandy - most of the time they all just want a quickie and then roll over. These days, so do I mostly - haven't got the stamina I used to have for getting through the day after no sleep. But on occasions we still do surprise each other. And he does know a few tricks. And he'd kill me if he knew I was having this conversation with you!! By the way- I think it's time we checked if those two haven't killed each other yet!"

Terry observed his son across the table until the door closed. He stood up and went over to the bar, pouring himself a shot of Scotch. "Do you want one?"

Harry shook his head. 

"A beer?" 

Harry nodded. Terry took a can out of the bar fridge and threw it over to him.

"Look, Dad, I shouldn't have..."

Terry held his hand up. "No. Nor should I.  It just shocked me. I don't know why. Just seeing you like that. I mean, suddenly realising you were a man and were with a woman. Thinking how I held you when you were a baby and now you were... It was pretty graphic, Harry. That position doesn't leave much to the imagination, does it? Say you'd caught me and Annie in that position - how would you feel?"

"Impressed." Harry eyed his Dad up for a reaction.

"You cheeky bugger..." Terry threw a bread roll across the table at him. "Think I'm past it, do you?"  They both burst out laughing.

"Not really. Just joking. Anyway you made another conquest tonight, so that will pump your ego up a bit."

"Conquest?" Terry looked puzzled.

"Yeah. Mandy thinks you're fuckable."

"She thinks what?" Terry choked on his whisky.

"You heard."

"She's young enough to be my daughter!"

"And you don't perve after young women? C'mon Dad. I've seen you when you're driving around. You never miss a tight little arse."

"Habit. But looking is one thing."

"Annie'd have your dick if you did more than look. That's all that's stopping you!"

Terry grunted but his eyes were showing amusement. "I'm a very happily married man. Wouldn't dream of it."

"Yes, you would dream of it. You just wouldn't do it, that's all. So you didn't shag your way around Sydney when you were my age?"

"When I was your age I was in the army - doing a man's job not bumping around Thailand for six weeks at my father's expense. You don't know how lucky you are, mate."

"Like soldiers don't get any? Where were you when you were twenty, anyway?"

Terry thought for a moment and then grinned. " Malaysia. Doing three months jungle training." His grin suddenly widened and he snorted.

"What's so funny?"

"Just thinking about that. R and R in Penang." He slumped back in his chair and put his hands on his head. "Christ, Harry, we were like animals when we got back to the island. Could hardly zip my shorts up. Hadn't been near a woman for 12 weeks. Thought I'd come in my pants when this Chinese girl sat on my lap. We were in this strip club and..."

Annie crept up to the dining room door. She could hear Terry's voice but not what he was saying. However he didn't seem angry. Suddenly Harry burst out laughing.

"You did what? On the stage? With two of them?  What did your mates say?"

Annie looked at Amanda. "What are they talking about? Let's give them a shock..." She opened the door and barged straight in. Terry stopped mid-sentence and looked at Harry. The two of them started giggling.

"Is he boasting again, Harry? It's all talk. He has a vivid fantasy life." Annie said. "Right. Seeing as we are playing happy families again, do you think we could change the subject and hear about your holiday in Thailand?"

Later that evening, Terry took a shower while Annie said goodnight to the young couple. He came out of the bathroom with a towel round his waist; his hair wet and tousled.

"You do know I've put them in the same room, don't you? I told them to lock the door- the kids will bounce in at some ungodly hour in the morning and who knows what they might disturb!  Don't start freaking out again but it's stupid to make them sleep in separate bedrooms."

Terry shrugged. "I know. But if it were Zoe would you be as broad minded? Or even Liam?"

"I don't know. I hope so. I'm glad you two made it up. I thought you were going to really blow again when we left the room. What did you say?"

"Told him how it made me feel. Sad. Proud. All mixed up emotions. You should never see your kids like that. It just took a while for me to process it, that's all."

"Did it turn you on?"

"What? Are you crazy?"

"No. But it was a very explicit sexual act. It was bound to have a physical effect on you."

Terry grunted and threw down the towel, pulling back the bedclothes and slipping in. Annie jumped on the bed. "Sex is very complicated, Terry. I wouldn't be shocked if you admitted it."

"I got a hard-on from the sight of my own son and his girlfriend putting on a live show? No, I didn't. I already had one. I thought it was you in the shower. Was planning to do the same thing as Harry. Now that freaked me out, love!" He admitted ruefully.

"Fancy another shower?"

"C'mon Annie - that's sick!"

"I know." She smiled and licked her lips, stepping off the bed and lifting the hem of her T-shirt. She was naked beneath, her small soft butt wiggling suggestively as she moved away.

Terry threw back the covers and grabbed her, pulling her towards the bathroom as she shrugged off the shirt. They didn't make the shower. Terry pushed her against the tiled wall and hauled her hips to the angle he required. He stroked her between her legs and growled into her ear when he felt how wet she was. "No need for foreplay?" he grunted as he parted her cheeks and entered her.

"You are such a charmer, Terry!" Annie whispered.

"What do you want then? Tell me."

"Let's be a bit kinkier. I have more than one hole, you know?"

Annie heard his hiss as he pulled out and ran his thumbs between her cheeks. 

"Get me some cream," he gasped.  She bent over to the cupboard to find something appropriate and Terry moaned as he looked at her. Annie glanced in the mirror; he was stroking her with his left thumb whilst jerking himself with his right hand, his eyes never leaving her. The expression alone made her juices flow.

"Here, baby" Annie smeared his rock hard cock with the cream, shivering with anticipation at what he was about to do. He extended his fingers to her and she coated them with cream too.

Terry leant her over the top and knelt down to kiss her naked buttocks as he gently eased a finger into her rectum. Annie gasped and instinctively tightened; he massaged her lightly until she relaxed.

"Easy, baby. Relax. It's been quite a while. I won't hurt you." Terry whispered as Annie whimpered. She began to rub herself as he stretched her wider with a second finger and she thrust a finger in her own cunt.

"Look up, Annie. Look at your face. I want you to watch us." He was breathing heavily and she caught his eyes for an instant, seeing the same lust-filled expression in them as in her own. Then she watched as he removed his fingers and rubbed the tip of his greased up cock against her. Waves of sensation coursed through her and she moaned deep and low; it was a feral sound. He pushed inside and stopped as she adjusted and then pushed again; little by little she opened up to him as he ground his hips in a circular motion and finally hilted himself in her.

"Aaaaaagh!" Was all she could say as her head dropped against the cold granite surface. Terry raised her chin roughly; "Look!" he grunted between gritted teeth. Annie reached between her open legs and held his sac in one hand; it was his turn to groan. With her other hand she rubbed her own clit as he began to move more urgently.

"I'm going to come. You're so tight...I can't hold on...." His words were the final stimulus- she felt her nub contract and the explosion of a clitoral orgasm as his balls repeated the action and he burst into her. It was a long time since either had felt such intensity and force in coming. Words were not possible. Thoughts were not possible. Their bodies had become mere sensation, every nerve ending screaming its message to the place of their joining.

Terry felt her knees buckle beneath him and instinctively managed to brace her against him but even her slight weight was difficult for him to hold in his current drained state. Reluctantly he pulled back and eased out, aware that even that movement and his now softer member made her shudder orgasmically. Sinking back to sit on the toilet seat, he pulled her on to his knee. And they rested there; Annie slumped back on him and he resting his head on her shoulder. Neither moved for some time.

"Terry. I thought I was going to hyperventilate. I could hardly get my breath. What did you do?"

"Dunno. Fucked your arse. But it felt like I just invented something new. Christ, I couldn't even support you. You fucking milked me dry. I'm too old for this." He smiled into her ear.

"You are simply getting better with age. I've changed my mind about twenty year olds. Give me a real man any time. He can still teach me a few tricks. Now when you recover the use of your legs don't you think we should take that shower and clean ourselves up?"

"Run the bath, love. I don't think I want to stand up. Let's just lie in the warm water and doze."

"You got it, tiger," Annie growled in his ear as she kissed him and hit the taps.

PART THREE

A few days' later Terry sat at the breakfast table attempting to read the newspaper while his two children prattled on and shovelled in cereal.

"Dad? Dad? Why does Amanda sleep in Harry's bed?"

He glanced up at Zoe. "Because she's his girlfriend."

"Why do girlfriends and boyfriends sleep in the same bed?"

"Boys like to look after their girlfriends."

"Why?"

"In case they have a bad dream or something." Terry hoped that would be enough.

"Mum is old and I'm only five - you should sleep with me, Dad. I'm always having nightmares."

"I wouldn't fit in your bed, princess."

"Well, let Mum sleep in my room and I sleep with you in your bed." She always had an answer for everything.

"Is Mum your girlfriend?" Liam was now in the act.

"Yeah, mate."

"No, she isn't! She's your wife!" Zoe insisted knowingly.

"She used to be my girlfriend."

"Was that when you weren't old, Dad?" Liam asked with his usual grace.

"Yeah, mate, something like that."

"When you fought the Germans?"

"The what?" Terry raised his eyes at that.

"He means in the War, Dad," Zoe added.

"Yes, Zoe, I do know about the Second World War but I'm a bit young for that. I wasn't even born then." Terry wondered why all the women in his family seemed to treat him like an idiot.

"NOT BORN THEN?" They both shrieked together as if the idea that there had ever been a time when their Dad wasn't around had never even occurred to them.

"Dad?" Terry sighed. They still hadn't finished." Is Mum Harry's Mum too?"

"No."

"But you're his Dad."

"Yeah."

"But why isn't Mum his Mum?"

"Because Harry has his own Mum. You don't remember her. She's called Auntie Penny."

Zoe sat and thought awhile. Her face reminded Terry of Annie- she was working it out. He also recognised the look when the penny dropped.

"Dad, was Penny your wife too?"

"It's very complicated, love. Ask your Mum to explain it."

"You always say that!" Zoe protested.

Annie walked in with her reading glasses on the end of her nose, grabbed a piece of toast and a cup of coffee.

"Mum? Has Dad got two wives?"

"What? I bloody hope not. You been keeping secrets from me, Thorne?"

"She means Penny."

"Oh, of course. Dad was married to Penny years ago and then they got divorced. She's not his wife now, sweetie. He can hardly cope with me let alone another one!" Annie grinned over at him.

Terry wondered about Annie's direct approach but surprisingly it seemed to work- Zoe accepted the answer and shut up. Maybe he should try honesty next time.

"I've got a boyfriend." Zoe's grasshopper brain had thankfully moved on.

"What's his name? Is he loaded? Does he have earplugs?" Terry asked.

"He's called Gregory."

"That's Gregory, darling. Not 'Grigory'." Annie chipped in.

"Well, he says Grigory."

"That's because he's an Aussie. Pronounce it properly, Zoe." Annie insisted.

"So am I, aren't I, Dad? I'm an Aussie too."

"Yes, love." Terry replied.

Annie pulled her tongue out at him.

"He sits on my knee at playtime."

Terry looked up from his newspaper. "Shouldn't you be on his knee?"

Zoe raised her eyes and tutted. "He's not strong enough. I'm bigger than he is. I have to peel his tangerine, he can't do it."

Terry put his head in his hands and grinned. "Sounds a right animal."

"I don't like girls," announced Liam. "I like boys."

Annie giggled and pouted across at Terry. "See how you cope with a poofta in the family. You'll be praying for some boy-girl shower action then!" she whispered in his ear.

"Can you marry a boy, Dad?"

"Only if you're a girl, mate."

"That's not fair!"

"Life is tough, Liam, me old mate."

"But girls always want you to kiss them- yuk!" Liam added.

"I bet they don't want to kiss you- your face is always dirty." Zoe said bossily.

"They do. But I can run faster'en them."

Annie and Terry snorted at the same time. Liam was a natural. Perhaps he might consider a career in stand up?

"Terry- can you do me a really big favour? I've got some papers to grade before my ten o'clock. Could you drop Zoe at school and Liam at nursery?"

"Sure. Right, you two- I want you ready by the door in fifteen. Get going."

Fifteen minutes later Terry ran downstairs, fixing his tie and carrying his major's jacket over his arm- it was too hot to wear it until he got there. He picked up his car keys and briefcase but they were not ready. Liam was struggling with his laces, Zoe couldn't find her reading book; both had to run back for their snacks. Then Zoe remembered that she needed some money for a school trip and Liam wanted a carrot for the rabbit. By the time they left, Terry was seething; Annie was amused.

Silence. Wonderful. Sitting down at her desk in the study, she was soon deep in a singularly indifferent essay. Liberally scrawling red marks and muttering 'Bullshit! Read a book! Think I'm as dense as you?' She jumped when the phone beside her rang.

"Who is it?" She asked abruptly.

"Annie?" A tentative voice spoke.

"Mel? Is that you?"

"Yes."

"What time is it in New York? Isn't it the middle of the night?"

"No it's not that late. Anyway I was awake. Annie, I need to talk to Terry. Is he there?"

"No, he just left. Is something the matter?"

There was a silence on the line and then Annie heard a sob.

"Mel, are you crying?" Suddenly a shiver ran down her spine. "Is Dino alright?" The sobs changed to tears and Mel cried into the phone for several minutes incapable of explaining herself.

"Mel, pull yourself together! You have to tell me what is wrong. Please."

There was a pause. Mel was clearly trying to compose herself.

"Annie, I have to talk to Terry. I need him."

"I'll get him to call you. Won't you tell me what it is?"

"Dino. He's in trouble - he needs Terry but he won't ask. He can't ask.  I know Terry would be there like a shot if he knew. He wouldn't let anything happen to Dino."

"Mel - are you saying that you want Terry to fly somewhere and help Dino on a case?"

"Yes."

"He can't, Mel. You know that. He wouldn't go back He can't involve himself now he's back in the army. Dino's got dozens of trained personnel on the company books. Terry's out of the game."

"Are you saying he wouldn't help Dino if it was a matter of life or death?"

"I'm not having Terry go back to that shit again. You can't ask that of him. It's different for Dino - he hasn't got kids..."

Mel swore. "I never thought I'd see the day when you let Dino down. Terry won't. When I tell him, he won't even think twice..."

"Don't ask him! Please, Mel. I'm begging you - I can't go through that again!"

"Dino never let you down. Whenever you or Terry needed him he was there for you. Without a question."

"They worked together then. Terry can't just up and leave his post. He's a soldier with a senior government job. I won't let him go back..." Mel slammed down the phone.

Annie put her head in her hands. 'Not now! I cannot go through it again. Not even for Mel and Dino.'

PART FOUR

Terry found Annie's car in the lot and waited. It was just past twelve- she would be out soon. He lit up a cigarette and leant back on the car hood, his mind already humming with the various matters he needed to deal with before he went. A few young male students, obviously amused by his military uniform, which was totally out of place on a university campus, shouted anti-military slogans across at him. Terry raised his middle finger absentmindedly, hardly interested in their political views.

Annie's voice startled him. "What are you doing here? Are you smoking again?"

He spun round. "Annie, I need to talk to you. Let's go to lunch. There's a Greek place across the road. It looks OK."

Annie threw her briefcase in the boot and followed him. They crossed the road in silence. It was still early and they found a quiet window table and ordered. Neither seemed inclined to begin the inevitable conversation. Terry poured wine.

"Annie, I know you've spoken to Mel."

"I don't want you to get involved."

"I've no choice. This is very serious. Dino needs me."

"Why? It's been three years. You're out of practice- no longer as sharp as you were. It's bound to be dangerous. There are so many others he could call on."

"This is different. I'm the only one who can help."

"Why?"

"Because I know the people. I have contacts. They will only deal with me. It's very complicated..."

"I'm not smart enough to understand? Don't play that fucking game with me!" Annie snapped. "You promised you would never go on active again. I will not allow it. This time I'm putting my foot down."

"I can't let a mate down. Not Dino. Not ever."

"You can let me and the children down though, can't you?"

"That is not fair. This is not a competition."

"That's exactly what it sounds like. Terry, I put up with years on my own, worried every time the phone rang. I was nearly raped to death because of that job. I sat by your bed while you hovered between life and death for five days because of that job. I never once complained. I gave up my own career, my life in London, even my country for you - everything as soon as you asked me. This time I am not rolling over. You are going to do what I ask."

"I can't. Annie - I'm not asking for your permission. I'm telling you. I am going. I'll be careful but I am going. I have taken leave and have to do this as a private citizen - the army would not allow my involvement if they knew..."

"What? You are even putting your career on the line? You are in a highly confidential government position. How can you risk your reputation to go on some gung ho Mission Impossible?"

"Annie, shut up!"

The waiter arrived with their food. Annie looked through window, struggling with tears of frustration. Eventually they were alone again.

"Don't you ever dare tell me to shut up! I have a right to my opinion."

"You have a right to support me."

I always support you! Why do you never consider my feelings? Never once have you put me first."

"What? I've carried you since the day I met you! I've put up with your temper, your moods, your lousy housekeeping and your bloody awful cooking..."

"You shit! Terry, I am your wife! I gave you two children. I have never refused you anything. How dare you say those things! So you are perfect? You are bloody lazy, selfish, arrogant, boorish, chauvinistic and..."

"Well, that's cleared the air, hasn't it?" Terry pushed the plate away and lit up. 

"Annie - I love you. But I have obligations to other people. I knew Dino way before I ever knew you. You must understand that."

"He is not your wife. He is not your son or daughter. We have a prior claim on you now."

Terry raked his hands through his hair. He had never known anyone more intractable when she dug in her heels. "Let me tell you what has happened. I didn't want you to know because it is a very bad scene. But when you hear, you will know I have no choice...."

"I don't want to know. You think bad scene makes me feel any better about the whole thing? You should not be doing this. Whatever it is, it is dangerous. Do you have a fucking death wish or something?" She drained her glass and poured another. "It's typical of you. Fucking Sir Galahad. Some blonde bimbo cries on your shoulder and you give up your job and fly half way across the world at your own expense, let her fuck your head up and nearly get wasted in the process... but your parents? Harry? Me and the kids? Even Penny, for God's sake- 'cos you threw that marriage away by your own selfish behaviour - we don't get a look in, not a moment's consideration."

"Have you quite finished? How dare you throw that shit in my face! That was years ago and most of it is none of your fucking business anyway. Dino needs help. I am the only one who can. You may be my wife, but you don't own my life."

Annie stared at him for a long time; he glared back. "I will not accept you going back. I'm giving you an ultimatum. You put your wife, your children and your career first or else..."

"Or else what?" Terry stood up and walked out.

Annie paid the bill and left the restaurant. Neither of them had touched their food. She tried to appear composed but when she later ran a red light on the way home and almost had a terrible accident, she realised the state she was really in. Pulling over, she hit the steering wheel several times in frustration and then lay her head down on her crossed arms and wept.

For the next seven hours, Annie fought with her conscience and dragged herself through the motions. She picked up the children, took them to a swimming gala, tolerated the mindless chatter of other Mums, feigned interest in the interminable races and fielded the children's questions.

"Mum, where's Dad? He said he'd be here for my race."

"I think he's busy, Zoe. He must have forgotten."

"Dad never forgets. He promised and he never breaks a promise." The irony was not lost on Annie.

They went to Macdonald's and Annie sat and sipped on black coffee whilst they chomped their way through a Happy meal and chattered and bickered. She drove them home, bathed them, read stories and put them to bed. Minutes later, when she heard Liam running around and the sounds of quarrelling with Zoe, Annie blew. She caught Liam dunking Zoe's favourite Barbie doll in the toilet as she tried to struggle with him. Annie slapped him hard on his bare leg. Liam froze. Zoe froze.

"Go- to- bed! I've had enough of the pair of you!" 

Annie was ashamed as they crept off like little mice; she noticed Zoe comforting her brother and rubbing the red wheal appearing on his calf. Liam wasn't the real target of her violent reaction - just the unfortunate catalyst who had stood in his father's place.

It was almost eight before she heard Terry's car. He came in but went straight upstairs. Annie heard the shower run and the sounds of him moving around. He made no attempt to find her. After thirty minutes or so had passed, she caught his tread on the stairs; she heard his voice making a call.

"Terry?" Annie stood at the door of the lounge. He was dressed casually in jeans and an open necked white shirt; his leather jacket was lying on top of his carry-on. He was zipping up his laptop case. "What are you doing?"

"I'm on the midnight flight. I just rang for a cab."

"I don't want you to go."

"It's too late. I'm going."

Annie walked over to him and tried to touch him but he shrank back.

"That won't work either," he sneered.

"You can't go without at least letting me hold you," Annie pleaded.

Terry looked at her with a cold intense stare; it made her shiver. "I never thought I would look at you and not feel desire," was his brutal reply.

A taxi horned and he opened the door, picking up his bags.

"NO! Not like this," Annie shouted after him.

Terry turned round, his eyes glinting coldly. "You made it abundantly clear this afternoon where you stood. If you want to play your games, then play them. I have something more important to do. And you're not the only one who can make threats. You back me up - or else. Got that?"

"Or else what?"

"You work it out. You're so fucking clever."

He flung himself into the cab and it drove straight away.

PART FIVE

The prison rose like a tawny juggernaut from the soft curves of the desert sand. Its angular walls shattered the barren beauty of the landscape. As the car travelled along the pencil straight highway that led to the high security complex, Terry Thorne viewed the scene with dismay. It was even worse than he had feared.  The fortress prison was almost invulnerable in itself but the hostile wilderness in which it stood made escape virtually impossible. His agile mind combed through the files of information and experience he carried but for once the search engine came up with a frustrating reply: No Data Available.

It had taken three weeks even to gain permission to visit. Despite contacts in the Saudi government and with the US Embassy, such access was limited. Today he was in the company of a senior US Embassy official, Gary Bruton, and a Saudi lawyer. Terry's nominal role was as a representative of the prisoner's company. It was only a white lie.

Approaching the main gate armed guards ordered them from their vehicle, which was then directed to an area outside the grounds. They would have to walk the rest of the way. At the threshold, they were led into a small cell like room. Guards instructed them to strip to their underwear and their clothes were searched. The bag of medicine and food stuffs was perused and certain items removed: cigarettes, spare clothes, matches, chocolate, cash, newspaper and girly magazines. They left the OR salts, antibiotics, fruit and a copy of the Bible. Terry repressed a smile of satisfaction. So predictable. So easy to smokescreen them. 'I haven't completely lost it', he mused.

Guards moved forward to body search them. Terry wondered whether that was really part of the required procedure. The young man who thrust his hands down the front of Terry's shorts and cupped his genitals, allowed his hand to linger rather longer than was strictly necessary, a leering grin on his face. Terry stared at him impassively while his thoughts ran something like 'Will you be sorry, mate when I've finished with you, you fucking little cock sucker!' Then they were allowed to dress again.

On the corridor, they were led down a maze of corridors: upstairs, across hallways, through landings, all flanked by tiny cells and the sounds of desperate humanity. Eyes peered at them, hands and fingers outstretched, voices begging in various languages for someone to intercede. Everyone was innocent, held illegally, denied justice - some of them probably were. The deeper they went, the more airless and foetid was the atmosphere. Light was provided by occasional single bulbs; sanitation must have been cursory and rarely emptied if the stench was anything to judge by; bathing probably non - existent. Down in this nether world, the inhabitants lived in near perpetual dark and had conditions that most rats would have found unacceptable.

"Can you not insist on better conditions for US citizens?" Terry queried of the embassy guy, Bruton.

"Depends. Your friend is not high on the priority list. He has been an embarrassment at a time when we are courting the Saudis. Unfortunate but his bad timing, I'm afraid." Terry swore profanely but Bruton merely shrugged. Lapenti was a shady character and had probably brought this on himself; he was no innocent tourist or expat caught in a sting.

A cell door was opened and the three men plus guards entered. It was crowded even though the others hung back by the door. The room was dark and they had to struggle to adapt their vision. Terry stepped forward and knelt by the low cot on the far wall. Dino was asleep.

He looked far worse than Terry had imagined. Dino was surprisingly wiry and could live for days on little food or sleep; deprivation normally seemed to make him more dangerous. He had immense powers of endurance and an indomitable will that made him thrive in even the most bleak of circumstances. It never occurred to Dino that he might fail. The man lying before Terry looked as if he had completely given up.

Dino was shrunken and sallow even below the growth of beard. He seemed almost to have disappeared beneath the blanket. His breathing was laboured and there was a disturbing rattle that Terry recognised was dangerous.

"Hey Dino, mate. Wake up. You gonna sleep all day?"

PART SIX

Terry stood by the window of his hotel room staring out into the night over the lights of Riyadh to the desert beyond. It was impossible. A breakout could not be achieved without a major assault from land and air with a large team; more like a small army. Could he put together such a caper? Probably - but the repercussions would be devastating. It would cause a serious international incident; they would be guilty of an illegal hostile action in a sovereign allied state. He would be court martialed, career in ruins and probably receive a prison sentence.  What would that do to his family? Not to mention those of all the men who involved themselves with him. On the other hand they might still fail - and then it wouldn't just be Dino who was facing death by public beheading.

Could he manage to get in alone or with a small team? Possibly - the outer security was tight but within the prison itself the guards were lazy and scarce; no one expected intruders inside. The problem would be getting out. To cross the desert without being seen, even at night- the prison had the latest surveillance equipment, helicopter sweeps and night sight beacons. There was nowhere to hide and Dino could not move fast. With only one patrolled road, they would have to cross the sand...impossible - unless he really did have a death wish. And he didn't. No risks. All he wanted to do was go home and be back with them. Sit around the breakfast table and hear Zoe chewing his ear off about her latest ballet class, Liam babbling about football and his skateboard and Annie..., God, Annie. Where exactly were he and Annie now?

He checked his watch. It would be early morning at home. He dialled the number. It rang a long time before Zoe picked up and screamed with delight. He smiled as she started to talk as if he had only been gone for two minutes. She was going to start horse riding and that was all that was on her mind. Then Liam snatched the receiver and they had a fight until Annie intervened and spoke:

"So, it's you."

He cleared his throat. "How is everything?"

"Great." Her voice belied her words.

"I miss you all."

"I'll bet."

He grimaced. "Annie..." he stopped. What did he want to say?

"Liam wants a word..."

"Wait, Annie..." but she had already handed over the phone and, as he tried to talk to his son, he lit up a cigarette and poured another slug of Scotch.

"Can you put Mum back on, mate?" He heard him shout 'Muuuum!"

"She says she's busy. We have to go to school now, Dad..."

He sank back down on the bed, thinking. Later. He would deal with them later. Head clear and think. Another angle. Then he had it. He wondered why it had taken him so long. Must be slowing down, losing it. But it was coming back.

Soraya Ahmadi jumped down from the school bus and waved to her friends. The bus pulled away and the electric gates of her home swung open to welcome her. As she turned and nodded at Mus the armed guard who stood by the gate, she heard a sudden screech of a vehicle speeding around the corner; it appeared to brake sharply. Soraya saw Mus run forward to grab her and push her inside but it was too late. Someone approached from the rear, Mus crumpled and she was roughly hauled up, thrown over the shoulder of a large man and thrust into the back of a van, her captor falling in with her. A door slammed and the vehicle sped off. The whole incident must have taken scarcely a minute.

As her brain began to register what had happened to her, Soraya, scrambled away and sat, legs drawn up, against the side of the van. The man was dressed in black, his face covered by a balaclava style hat. He held his hands up as if to show her he meant no harm.

"I'm sorry, Soraya. I won't hurt you. Do you speak English?" His voice was deep, calm and steady and, despite her panic, she suddenly didn't feel afraid.

"Yes. I speak English. Who are you? Why am I here?"

I can't tell you who I am. I have kidnapped you. If your father does something for me, I will let you go."

"Kidnapped me? Do you want money? Is this about money? Do you know what they will do to you when they catch you? This is not America. They will kill you, probably torture you. Let me go and I will not say anything. Please." Soraya pleaded.

The man shook his head. "This is not about money. This about a man's life. They will not take me. I know what I am doing."

"Please. Let me go."

"I cannot, Soraya. I'm sorry."

"And if my father cannot do what you ask?"

The man looked searchingly at her, his blue green eyes suddenly intense. "This is not a game, Soraya. I am playing for high stakes. Your father has to understand that. I will not hesitate to do what is necessary to secure my aims."

Suddenly Soraya no longer felt so secure with this man. He was not some kind of lunatic terrorist but something much more dangerous than that. He was a professional and, although she didn't think he would purposely be cruel, he was obviously prepared to kill if he had to. The journey passed in silence.

Shortly afterwards the vehicle came to a stop. The van doors opened and the man jumped out and spoke briefly to two other masked men. He turned back to the van and put his hand out to help her out. She shrugged it away and jumped out. They were inside a disused warehouse of some sort and one of the other men, a Saudi by his accent, told her to follow him and she was led into an office. There was a woman dressed in a burkah, her face covered; Soraya was not fooled by the garb - it was a disguise. The woman was in the company of three men - the offence of khalwat. Enough to have her picked up if found - especially as one of the men was a European.

"Sit down, Soraya, roll up your sleeve!" The woman was also a Saudi. Who were these people that they would collude to kidnap one of their own? The woman moved and Soraya noticed that she had a metal dish containing a syringe.

"What are you going to do to me?" Soraya gasped.

Make you sleep. That is all. Do not be afraid." Soraya began to struggle and try to make for the door. The women held her. "Don't struggle! I will have to bring the men in. Do you want them to lay hands on you?"

Soraya still fought her captor and the woman shouted. The door opened and the American came in. He took her by the arms, holding her from behind in a grip so strong that she could not move a muscle. The woman swabbed her upper arm and she felt the prick of the injection. Within seconds her vision began to swirl and her legs went from under her. Her last memory was being carried in strong arms.

Light streamed in from a window high above her and for an instant she was back in her room and shaking the nightmare from her. Then she saw her surroundings. This was no affluent teenager's bedroom in a wealthy Riyadh suburbs. She was lying on a narrow bed in a tiny bare room, its dirt floor strewn with straw. The only furniture was a rickety table on which were placed a bowl of water, some soap, a towel and a bottle of mineral water. There was also a chair, which appeared to have some clean clothes neatly folded.

Soraya sat up. She felt groggy but not unwell. Her mouth was dry and she stumbled to the table and drank gratefully from the mineral water. There was a knock at the door and she spun round. It opened and the man entered. His face was still masked but he was now wearing jeans and a white T - shirt. He looked bronzed and fit, the body of an athlete. His hair was thick and brown. For an instant she wondered what his face was like.

"Soraya? How are you?"

She shrugged. "I do not know. Where am I?"

"India."

"What?" Soraya shouted. "How long have I been asleep?"

"Many hours. We drove across the desert and then flew by private jet to this place."

"Have you contacted my father?"

"Yes."

"And?"

"He wants a proof of life."

"What does that mean?"

The man indicated the digital camera he was carrying and the newspaper. It was The Times of London. The date was two days since she had been kidnapped. He sat her back on the bed and handed her the paper - she was to hold it up and he snapped several pictures of her. Then he left the room. Soraya noticed that he did not lock the door so she followed him out.  Before her was a larger living room, basic but containing a dining table and chairs, a two jet camping stove with a gas bottle and a refrigerator. The man was already at a laptop and uploading the image. Her father would know she was alive.

Sitting at the table across from him, she watched him work. " What now?"

"We wait."

He pushed across a covered plate. It contained cheese and fruit with some crackers. Soraya realised how hungry she was and she ate. The man stood by the door and looked out, smoking a cigarette. He appeared to be deep in thought.

"Why me?" Soraya asked.

The man turned round. "Just your bad luck."

"What does that mean?"

"Your father is a government minister. He is in charge of Home Affairs. I need him to free my friend."

"From prison?"

The man nodded.

"He will not bend."

"For you, he will bend."

"You do not know my father."

"No man will risk his daughter's life."

Soraya knew he spoke the truth. She was the apple of her father's eye, his only daughter in a houseful of four sons. He would move heaven and earth to free her; he would hunt this man down until he had destroyed him.

"Do you have a daughter?" Soraya asked.

The man nodded.

"Then how can you do this to me? How would you feel if it were your daughter?"

He did not answer, merely dragged more deeply on his cigarette and turned back to his contemplations of the outside scene.

Ahmadi Khadir responded immediately. The American was to be freed. The case against him had been a set up anyway; he was some kind of hostage negotiator who had annoyed a Saudi millionaire and evidence had been rigged against him. Khadir had known about the case, refused to intervene but now it was different. Charges were dropped and the man was released into the custody of the US embassy. CNN covered the story and shot pictures around the world of the man arriving on US soil at the same time as Soraya Ahmadi walked into a police station on the outskirts of Bombay and asked to be given help. She had already called her family on the mobile phone the man had given her. By the evening she was home. She had never known his name or seen his face. He had hardly spoken to her.

Her father asked her to work with security agents to try to identify the man. Khadir wanted revenge. Soraya knew enough to know what that might mean. She leafed through dozens of photographs of European men who were in some way connected to the company of the released American. No one came near to the man she had been with. At the bottom of the pile was a photograph of a previous partner. She looked at the photograph of a handsome brown haired man with blue green eyes. His name was Terrence Thorne. He was an Australian. The notes said he now lived in Canberra with his wife and two young children, one of whom was a daughter aged five. Soraya knew without a doubt that this was the man. She threw the file back on the rest. "It is none of these. He was a heavy-set older man with little hair. He spoke with an English accent."

He hadn't hurt her. She didn't want anyone to die. The thought that this man's little daughter might be sacrificed to assuage her own father's anger disturbed Soraya. Leave things as they are. Perhaps he had had good reason to do what he did. Somehow she did not imagine that he would have acted like this otherwise.

PART SEVEN

She heard the car screech to a halt in the driveway and the headlights fleetingly lit up the darkened room. Switching off the bedside lamp, Annie slipped down under the covers. It was after midnight and she guessed he was drunk again. One of these days the police would stop him and he'd be in shit up to his ears. The Ministry would not be impressed if he were pulled in for drunk driving; he was becoming a security risk. At least he had come home. Recently he had gone off and only reappeared the next day, hung over and smelling of other women. God knows where he went or whom he went with.

It was several months since he had returned from his little disappearing act. Annie had listened to the news reports of Dino's release with shock. Terry was not mentioned but she knew he had been involved - what exactly had he done? One thing was for sure. Whatever had happened it had disturbed him greatly. They had both been cold with each other on his return, the bitter scenes of their parting still rankling. Terry had closed in on himself. He wouldn't open up to her, so Annie began to ignore him. If it was this bad then she was all the more sure that what he had been involved in was probably criminal and he might be in serious trouble if he were found out.  Maybe they still were in trouble - what had he brought down on their family? The gulf between them widened and they began to live separate lives.

There had been some sex - in the early days, he had rolled over her and taken her quite dispassionately a few times with little comment. Eventually, Annie had pushed him away and he had stormed out - she wasn't letting him use her body to ease his guilty conscience. They didn't discuss it but he moved into the spare room. The children appeared confused but Annie snapped at them a few times and they soon stopped asking questions.

The front door slammed. He lurched up the stairs and she hoped he wouldn't disturb Zoe or Liam. They had seen him drunk a few times recently and it had scared them. His footsteps sounded on the upstairs landing and she listened to the sound of him make his way to the guest room. He stopped. She waited to hear the door close but nothing. Then his footsteps picked up and he suddenly entered their bedroom.

Annie closed her eyes and feigned sleep as he walked over to the bed; she felt him watching her. She tried to breathe normally but she found herself trembling; he was too good to fool.

"Annie- I know you're awake. Stop fucking about."  He walked over to the bathroom and she heard him urinate noisily.

"You have your own bathroom," Annie snapped.

"I need a piss! Shut up," he was in a belligerent mood.

"Look, Terry, it's late and I want to sleep. Go to bed."

He began to pull off his shirt, yanking it over his head unbuttoned.

"This is not your bedroom, Terry." Annie warned.

"You didn't fucking pay for it," he replied. Annie swallowed hard; she did not like the way the conversation was going.

"I think you'd better leave now!"

He laughed. It was hard and mocking. He unzipped his pants and kicked off his shoes.

"Terry!" Annie knelt up and the sheet fell away. She suddenly realised that she was wearing nothing but a light vest and panties. He stared at her and she heard his breathing shallow. He continued to remove his pants.

She jumped out of the bed and made for the door; he was on her in an instant.

"Where the fuck you going?" He growled at her.

"To sleep in Zoe's room."

"Just fucking try it!" His hand moved from where it gripped her arm to fondle her breast and then circle round her waist. He grabbed her buttocks.

"Get off me!" Annie ordered

"I'm your husband."

"You do not have the right to be here. Terry, you are drunk and this is a bad situation. Think before you make a terrible mistake."

"I want you." His voice was low, barely audible.

"I don't want you." Annie replied firmly.

She heard him flinch at her words. "I don't believe you," he whispered back. His hands reached out and pulled her against him and he forced her head back. Lowering his face, he kissed her. Annie shook her head, trying to evade his probing tongue but he simply held her head more firmly and she knew that she was helpless. Fighting him would not stop him. He could have her as easily as he could swat a fly.

She groaned and he pushed her up against the bedroom wall, pulling off her panties and thrusting his hands between her legs. "Please, Terry, please..." And then it happened. Something in her broke. Annie felt her hands snake round his neck and realised that her lips were responding; some part of her was unable to shut out the desire that his body and his touch evoked in her. It was like some animal instinct and it made her feel sick. But she was too far gone to hold herself back.

Raking her nails down his back, she found herself pulling at his shorts and seizing his cock, moaning at the feel of it in her grip after so long. He hoisted her up against the wall. "Shove it in. You know you want it. I can have you whenever I want you. You can play your fucking games, Annie, but you are just a little bitch on heat..." He thrust into her.

"I hate you!" Annie gasped as he roughly drove himself inside. He knew she needed more time to adjust. He wanted to hurt her.

"Yeah, but you want my dick...you like it rough? I'll give you rough..."

He banged her hard against the wall as he pumped wildly into her.

"Tell me you like it... Tell me you want me to fuck you..."

Annie moaned. "Tell me!" He shouted.

"I want you to fuck me, you bastard! You satisfied? Fuck me! I still hate you."

He lifted her off the wall and carried her over to the bed. They glared at each other and Annie grabbed his face and kissed him brutally, biting his lip and drawing blood. He threw her down and tossed her onto her front, yanking her hips up and plunging in her. "Want to know what I do to little bitches like you?" He forced her head down and rammed over and over again. Annie waited for her chance and as he dropped his arms to the bed for support; she pulled away and turned to face him.

"So you can force yourself on a little woman? Big hero. Proud of yourself?" 

Annie pushed him back on the bed and straddled him, skewering herself on his cock. "OK, so I want you. Big deal. Now see if you can actually come. Or have you drunk too much to do more than wave it about?"

He flipped her over and they writhed, half mad with passion, half mad with hate. There is a thin line. They were teetering on the edge. Terry held her arms above her head and forced her legs wide with his knee. He took her hard and she responded, bucking against him and screaming insults at him as she came; he followed her with a string of obscenities and a roar.

The room fell silent. For an awful moment, Annie had a vision of the children having woken and come in; standing by the door watching the bestiality of their parents. But the door was closed and the house was quiet. All that she could hear was the desperate panting that Terry was making as he lay above her and the muffled sobs coming from her own mouth.

He rolled away and sat up on the bed, pulling his legs up into a foetal position, sinking his head on his knees. "I'm sorry, Annie... I don't know why I did that."

"Get out!"

"I know I was rough but... Christ, you wanted it too..."

"You just raped me. I should call the police."

"I didn't. You consented."

"You forced me to."

"I felt you come."

"Get out!"

"Annie, baby...we've got to talk. I'm half insane. You don't know what it was like... I didn't want to do it. I keep thinking of..."

"What are you talking about? Your little Outward Bound adventure in Saudi? You are having nightmares? And I'm supposed to care? You are too much, Terry. I warned you not to go - don't expect me to mop your fevered brow now you've fucked your head up again."

"Annie...I just need some time..."

"Time? And great quantities of alcohol and cheap women. Have I left anything out? Oh, yes, violent sex with your wife. Does that all come on prescription?"

"I just need you to stop thinking about yourself for one minute and start thinking about me." He was angry again.

"You? This is all about you. Everything is always about you. You ignored my advice. You got involved in this shit. So deal with it yourself. I'm sick of being your nursemaid. Who looks after my pain?"

Terry reached for her. "Annie, I didn't want to hurt you..."

She pushed him from her. "Get out! I don't want you in this house anymore. Tomorrow you move out. I want a divorce. Get out! I can't stand the sight of you. You make me sick."

He said nothing. Merely stood up and grabbed his clothes and left the room. The next morning, he was up at dawn and Annie watched as he threw a case into his car and drove away.

PART EIGHT

Annie sat at a table in the staff lounge and read a few memos while she drank her coffee. Suddenly she was aware that a man was standing over her. She glanced up.

"May I sit down? The other tables are occupied." He was a youngish man, maybe late twenties, dark and good -looking with an open smile. Annie noticed he had beautiful teeth and dark soulful brown eyes.

"Oh sure. Please do." Then she returned to her reading.

"You're a historian, aren't you?"

Annie looked up again. "How do you know? Do I have a sort of dried up and dusty look?"

He smiled again, flashing those perfect white teeth. "I'm in the Social Sciences Building - my office faces the entrance to Humanities. I've noticed you a couple of times." He blushed slightly. "My name is Brad Aristides. Crazy, hey? Half Greek, half Hollywood." They laughed.

"Anna Thorne. What's your field?"

"Politics. I'm finishing off my doctorate. And you?"

"Classics. And I'm a doctor, so I can pull rank on you!" She grinned.

"Wow! You must be a brain. How did you get your doctorate so young?"

"Young? I'm older than I look but thanks for the compliment. It's been a long time."

There was a break in the conversation and Annie tried to pretend she was reading. This Aristides guy was a real cutie. He was clearly hitting on her and she was tempted. Suddenly:

"You fancy lunch? There's a good Greek place near here. I'll show ya some Dolmades to die for!"

Annie smiled. "I don't think so, Brad. But thank you for the offer." He looked a little deflated and stood up to go.

"See you around then, Dr. Anna." 

"Wait!"

Brad turned back.

"Can I change my mind?" She wasn't going to let him walk away. Why should she? How long do you have to play the martyr?

She recognised the place instantly as they approached it. Her last visit was etched deeply in her subconscious.

"Should we have a window table?" Brad asked.

"No, I think I'd prefer the corner over there." Annie wasn't going to sit where they had sat when they had ripped their marriage apart.

She let him order- he claimed to know what their specialities were. They chattered lightly for a while and then Annie felt obliged to speak.

"Brad. It was really nice of you to ask me here but you need to know some things about me. I'm much older than you think. Tell me how old are you?"

"Twenty seven." 

Annie exhaled sharply.

"I'm thirty six, married with two children."

Brad's eyes widened. "Thirty six? You look about twenty-five tops. And you're not wearing a ring..."

"Actually my husband and I live apart. We are beginning divorce proceedings. I'm still pretty raw, Brad. It has only been six months. I'm not sure I'm really what a handsome young guy should be looking for. Find a girl who isn't dragging an albatross around with her."

He chewed on his lip and seemed to be thinking. "I want to get to know you. Everyone has issues. Everyone has a past. It's no big deal. Maybe you need a friend. I may have arrived at just the right time."

Annie smiled. "A friend? Yes, I think maybe I do. Here's to friendship, Brad!"  She raised her glass and they both smiled. Why not? Why shouldn't she begin to let her life go on?

"Anna? Fancy the opera? I've two tickets for Tosca on Friday." Brad had popped his head around her office door.

"Wonderful! I'll need to get a sitter- but that's no problem. I'll meet you there."

"I'll pick you up."

"No, Brad. My kids. They're pretty mixed up about things at the moment. I don't think I'm really ready to let them meet you yet." Annie and Brad had been dating for several weeks. Nothing too heavy- a few dinners, a rock concert, comedy bars and the cinema. It was still a platonic friendship. There had been little more than occasional handholding and a kiss goodnight. It was impossible to bring him home and she couldn't sleep at his place because of the children. Annie wondered whether it was enough for him; it certainly wasn't enough for her. She was constantly thinking about sex and so horny when she was with him. It occurred to her they might have to do it on the back seat of his car like two adolescents if it went much longer. Somehow the idea turned her on even more.

On Friday morning, Terry rang. As usual he was abrupt and to the point.

"Can I change the day? I'm not free to have them on Saturday night. Can I have them tonight instead?"

"What about my plans?"

"If it's a problem, Annie, just say so."

"No, actually it isn't. I'll get them ready for you. What time will you be here?"

"About five. Everything OK?"

"Yes. Enjoy your date."

"What date?"

"Saturday night."

"It's none of your business, Annie. I don't ask who you are seeing."

She slammed down the phone.

At five, they were ready with an overnight bag packed by the door. Liam was almost beside himself with excitement and Zoe was not far behind. It started up that dull ache in her stomach again to see their little faces so full of anticipation. They hadn't seen their father for over ten days.

His car pulled up and they ran out to him. Annie followed carrying their things. He took them from her and threw them in the boot.

"So what's the plan?" Annie enquired.

"I thought of taking them to a movie. Have they seen Spiderman?"

"No, but they are dying to see it. Just watch Liam after it. You know what he's like. He already thinks he can walk up walls." An uncomfortable attempt at humour.

"Dad. I made you a card," Liam interrupted. " It says 'I love you'. I wrote it myself."

"No, you didn't. I did it in pencil and you went over it. You can't write." Zoe boasted.

"I can write my name."

"It's only got four letters."

"Yours only has three!"

"Calm down. If you are going to start fighting before you have even left, then maybe you should stay with me," Annie chided.

"Mum, why don't you come? You'd like Spiderman." Zoe asked expectantly.

"I don't think I'm invited, love. And I'm going out later to the opera."

"Who with?" Terry suddenly spoke.

"I don't think who I see is any of your business," she threw his earlier words back at him. He noticeably flinched.

"I'll bring them back about the same time tomorrow. Enjoy your evening."

Annie watched as he bundled them all into the car and backed out of the drive. She turned to go into the house and then looked back. She caught his gaze; they both looked quickly away. The house seemed dead and empty when she closed the door. Sinking to the floor, Annie cried.

The evening was superb. Tosca was Annie's favourite opera and it was a wonderful production. When the curtain finally fell, they sidled out and made for a trendy bar nearby. It was a cool evening and Annie was wearing a fairly light floaty chiffon skirt and peasant style blouse with only a small jacket on top. Brad pulled her close. "You'll freeze!"

"I'm English. This is like a summer's evening! But don't take your arm away. It feels good." Annie could feel Brad's mood changing; she knew he was wondering if she was ready to take things further. It was up to her to show him that she was.

"My husband turned up today. He's got the kids for the night. I don't have to rush home...or...I mean...Brad, we're grown ups, for God's sake. I'm not into playing games. Do you want to come home with me? I would like you to. I think it's what we both want."

"Do you really want this drink? Or can we go now? 'Cos I don't think I can sit all night in this bar thinking about later. Let's have later now. What do you reckon, Anna?"

They drove home. He whistled when he saw the house. "He's got money, has he?"

"He earned it. So did I. I don't really want to talk about him, Brad. Want a drink?"

She led him into the large lounge but he caught her in his arms from behind. He nuzzled against her neck and nibbled her earlobe. "I want you. Nothing else. I can't sleep or hardly work because I think of you night and day." She felt him rub himself against her; he was already hard. Annie swivelled round and raised her mouth. It was no platonic kiss. The moment their lips met, they began to devour each other hungrily, as if they were starving. Falling to the floor, they continued to feed from each other, mouths, tongues, teeth, clothes pulled away and fingers struggling with buttons and zips.  He laid her back naked and stared at her; she gazed over his nakedness. For a long moment they looked at each other with pleasure.

Brad was tall and lithe, broad shouldered but slender with a tawny skin and thick straight dark brown hair worn longish. He had an impressive six-pack and his body felt rock hard; he had been a swimmer of some note and his body reflected the hours of training he had put in. His chest was covered with dark hair but it was not overly bearish; it thickened to a dark scruff beneath his navel and curled sensuously around his long cock.

Annie raised her hand and stroked his hardness; it swayed at her touch. "You were circumcised?"

"Yeah. My mother's Jewish. Don't you like it?" He teased.

"I like it fine. I'm not used to seeing them without their coat. It's a beautiful cock, Brad. You must be proud of it."

"Just wait until you see what it can do," he whispered.

Lowering himself down, he kissed her and the dance began. He was sinuous in his movements and, to her surprise, she did not feel like she expected. Somewhere she had wondered whether when he began to touch her, she would believe herself with Terry, but he didn't even come into her mind. This man felt so different in her arms; he moved her in a different way and, with a sudden recognition, she realised that she could feel again, that her life would not always be blighted by the man she had lost.

As she felt him place his cock on her moistened opening, just as he began to thrust inside her, Annie pulled back.

"Brad, stop. Do you have something?"

"You're not on the pill?"

"Not since... my husband had a vasectomy. There was no need." He nodded and found his wallet.

"I wasn't sure..." he tried to explain in an embarrassed voice.

"I'm glad you had the sense. Could you imagine how we'd feel if we had to stop here?" Annie smiled and he moaned as she lowered her head and licked his wet tip, tasting his pre-cum and feathering his length before sucking down on him long and hard and massaging his balls in her hand.

Brad raised her head and said, "Another time," and then pushed her down, opening her legs and rubbing his cock along her slit, bathing it in her wetness before snapping on the condom and plunging down to love her. He was young and strong and experienced enough to know when to go and when to stop. Annie lay back and let him pleasure her, bringing her to orgasm and then pulling out to drive her back again a moment later. When she believed he would not be able to last a second longer, he pulled out and buried his head between her legs, licking her nub until she cried in agony and ecstasy at his attentions. Then as she writhed in helpless abandon, he came into her again.

"This time for me, Anna. I'm gonna come in your beautiful cunt. I'm going to fill you up until you beg me to stop. You are so fucking horny. You taste so good. Anna, yes, milk me, squeeze me, aaagh, fuck..." Brad exploded into her, sweat dropping from his head and his eyes rolling back as he finally let himself go.  She held him in her arms until he stopped shaking.

"It's been so long, Anna. I wanted you so much," he moaned.

"For me too."

Brad rolled onto his side, holding her in his arms. "Why did he leave you? Is he crazy? Why would a man leave a woman like you?"

Annie covered her face with her hands. "I can't talk about it. He let me down in a really important way and it was never the same. We couldn't get back to where we had been. It was one fight after another. We stopped having sex. We slept in separate rooms for a while. One night he got drunk and well, he kind of forced me to... I didn't really say no but he was rough and that was it. I kicked him out. That was six months ago. We are only just beginning to be civil to each other.

Brad lit up; Annie took the cigarette and inhaled deeply. "Did you love him?"

"Yes," Annie whispered.

"Was it good with him before?"

"Yes."

"Will you patch it up?"

Annie shook her head. "He's not the kind of man who would forgive me. Once he makes his mind up, he can be formidable. Scary sometimes. He'd never hurt me- don't get the wrong idea. He's a good man but he'll never forgive me."

"What did you do?"

"I let him down."

"But you said he let you down."

"He doesn't see it that way. That's the point. We are at different points of the compass and there's a world in the way. He'll never take me back and I'm not sure that I want to go back. But the kids! It breaks their hearts. I wish we didn't have to hurt them so much."

Annie stood up and held out her hand to him. "I don't want complicated. I don't want love. I want a friend who I can have fun with and great sex. You are the perfect catch. But if you want more, I can't give you that. I don't want to live with a man, marry again or have other children. Can you accept that?"

Brad smiled. "I'm twenty seven. I want to be a politician. Prime minister one day, maybe! I don't want any encumbrances yet. But I want you and I would like to be your man for a while - maybe even longer than a while. Can I stay?" He took Annie's hand and they walked upstairs. It felt natural.

PART NINE

The doorbell rang while Annie was making breakfast. "Brad- get that will you?"

Brad ambled to the door in his pants, trying to locate his shirt. 

"Yeah?" There was a young man with long curly blonde hair at the door.

"Who the fuck are you?" The young man asked; he was a Pom with one of those poncy upper class accents that say ' fak' for 'fuck'.

"Could say the same about you, mate."

"Brad, who is it?" Annie called from the kitchen.

"Some little Pommy bastard." 

Brad heard her gasp and say 'Shit, shit, shit' and then she ran to the door.

"Harry? Oh God, why didn't you call? Why do you always do this?"

Harry surveyed Annie; she was wearing nothing but a man's shirt. Her hair was a mess and he could see the love bites on her neck and shoulders. His face fell. "I wanted to see Zoe and Liam. I was worried about you all. Dad won't talk about you. I thought you might need a friend. Seems you found one, though." He turned on Brad, his eyes glinting coldly. "You met my Dad, mate? He'd wipe the fucking floor with you, you wanker."

"That is enough! Your father and I are legally separated. He has his own life and I have mine."

"Annie - you can't fuck another guy with Dad's children in the house."

"Harry, don't speak to me like that. They're not in the house and they're my children too. Do you think I would do anything to hurt them?"

"You kicked Dad out. I don't suppose they enjoyed that too much."

"You don't know what happened."

"No, but I don't believe it was all his fault."

"Believe what you like. It's none of your business."

"Where are Zoe and Liam?"

"With your Dad."

"Cosy. They slip out the front and toy boy here slips in the back. I'll be off then. Go round to Dad's place."

"Harry, don't mention... please. You know how he is."

"Yeah - hurting. Don't worry, I don't want to add to it. Harry turned back to Brad and Annie recognised a familiar intensity in his eyes "But I'd get some self- defence training if I were you, mate. 'Cos when he does find out, he'll have your fucking balls. That'll put an end to your fun and games." Harry ran to his car and drove off in a squeal of tyres. Annie had recognised the catch in the young man's throat as he had turned away. Another victim of their failure.

Harry kept his promise. When they turned up at five, it was obvious that nothing had been said. The children were in high spirits and full of their trip to the cinema and morning on the beach- well wrapped up because it was September and still quite cold - but they had been beachcombing and had collected shells and starfish and little crabs. Terry stood awkwardly in the kitchen while they displayed their trove on the table.

"Thanks, Terry. They had a great time."

"I'm their Dad. You don't have to thank me. You enjoy your night out?" He glanced around; Annie wondered if he was checking for any signs of male occupancy.

"Yes, thanks. It was Tosca. One of my favourites."

"Sad ending?"

"They always are, Terry. You should know that by now," she replied quietly.

He cleared his throat as if embarrassed. Liam jumped up at her to give her a hug and pulled open the neck of her blouse. She saw Terry's eyes flare and realised that he had seen her neck. Stepping nearer, he touched the collar of her shirt.

"It wasn't just an audio-visual treat then. I hope he got his money's worth. Those opera seats cost a fortune. Certainly seems to have had a bite afterwards..."

"Shut up! I would slap your face for that if the children were not here. I will sleep with whomever I like. You taken up the veil? Somehow I don't see it. Who rakes their nails down your back these days?"

He walked out leaving the bewildered children crying because he hadn't kissed them goodbye. Zoe had the last word as usual:

"Why are you so horrible? You always make him angry. If it wasn't for you our Daddy would still live here. I hate you!"

PART EIGHT

Terry drove away from his home in a daze. Later he remembered nothing of the journey. Reaching his apartment, he poured himself a stiff Scotch and threw himself down on his bed. The vision of the raised red bite on Annie's neck burned into his brain. He couldn't stop seeing images of a man thrusting into her, touching her, tasting her. He found himself rocking backwards and forwards in a foetal position, groaning with the physical pain that the knowledge of her adultery gave him.

How had it come to this? How had they allowed it to run away from them until they could hardly speak a few words to each other without an argument? When he had arrived back from the Middle East, he had expected her to be cold - he'd been gone five weeks - but that it would eventually pass over. But it didn't. He had been hurt by her indifference and the lack of interest she showed in the awful events that Dino had suffered and he had witnessed.  He had wanted to tell her what he had done but he was too ashamed to admit it. After all those years helping the victims of kidnap, he had done the terrible deed himself. Kidnapped and terrorised a sixteen-year old girl. He had once believed that nothing gave anyone the right to brutalise and scare the innocent. Until he wanted something, that is, and then it suddenly became admissible. What kind of hypocrisy was that?

No wonder he hadn't dared to explain it all to Annie - how would she have reacted to the news that what evil men had once done to her, he had been able to do himself. How far would he have gone if Mr. Ahmadi hadn't played ball? In truth, he didn't know. He didn't want to know. He was scared to open that door inside himself that might reveal the level of degradation of which he was capable. And what if Ahmadi had put two and two together and wreaked his own revenge? If anything had happened to his family because he had chosen to commit this crime to save Dino...His words to Soraya still rang in his head " No man will risk his daughter's life.' But he had. Risked Zoe's life. Annie had been right- he had put the needs of others first again. He didn't blame her for her anger.

But she knew he was suffering and he could not believe that Annie could spurn him as she had done. Never had she treated him like that before - she had been the balm that had kept him going through so many nightmares in the past. That had made him so enraged that he had cold shouldered her for weeks and then the little things that they had always found annoying but usually laughed about suddenly became major character flaws; they began to hate each other. The children had realised something was wrong and the house, once so happy and secure, became like a prison. Every night something started them off and they would shout and fight until neither could stand anymore.

Annie wouldn't let him touch her and he had been so frustrated, especially needing relief after the nightmares of the time in Saudi Arabia. When he tried once too often, she had forced him into the spare room and he had almost wanked himself to death in there for a while. So he got drunk one night and pushed her too far. The memory was hazy but he didn't think he had raped her. She had responded to him; must have been as horny as he had been - but her desire for him had angered her even more and she had turned on him afterwards. Terrible things had been said and there was no going back. He left the next day and she saw a lawyer shortly after. It was finished. Who would have ever believed it possible?

At first he had screwed everything he could find, picking up women in bars, nightclubs, at the gym- many of them had hardly been Harry's age. He had never had a second date. Once he had finished with them, he had simply left and moved on. He rarely ever gave his full name to a woman; he didn't want to know theirs. Slowly his anger had subsided and he had met a woman at work with whom he was conducting a lukewarm affair but, although she was willing enough, her impassive nature and lack of adventurous inclination between the sheets was beginning to bore him. He knew what he wanted but he could never have it again. Annie.

The children were all that kept him sane at times. He knew he had to keep himself on track for them. They stopped him drinking too much, made him smarten himself up, clean his apartment. With them he touched the real world for a while and it was sweet and innocent in their company. But their confusion was killing him. They didn't know why he wasn't able to live with them again. Liam had become very insecure and was wetting the bed at night.  Zoe was clingy and hardly left his side when he was with them, Most nights that he had them, they all slept together in his bed; it was unclear who needed it most. Even Harry was hard hit and seemed to be floundering under the knowledge that even a marriage such as his father and Annie had could disintegrate into bitterness and hatred - what chance for the rest of them?

Forcing himself he took a shower; Beverley was cooking dinner for him tonight. She was the private secretary of the Minister of Defence, a consummate career woman, super efficient, a company woman through and through. Beverley had no desire to marry or have a family- a perfect casual bedmate. But she was too controlled. Beautiful, elegant and confident, her cool manner was reflected in her lovemaking. She expected technique, orgasms and satisfaction and didn't enjoy anything 'too messy'- she wouldn't go down on a man, allow unusual positions and definitely nothing kinky. He would eat, fuck and leave as if his services were simply part of a protocol. She wasn't the kind of woman whom you would hang onto in the middle of the night to make you feel safe. He towelled himself down. It would be a fuck. At least he wouldn't have to use his hand again.

He looked at himself in the bathroom mirror. He had aged. Forty-four now and his thick hair was showing grey. There were more lines in his face than he remembered and even his body, which he tried to keep fit, was looking more shrunken these days. He wasn't sure whether he quite fitted into his skin anymore.

Beverley's apartment was designer exclusive, the correct address, perfect in every detail. She was dressed in a silk Oriental style long skirt and fitted blouse and her blonde hair was loose, held back by a jewelled clip. She smelt of a rich exotic fragrance and the food was Thai - that was obviously the theme for the evening. When he greeted her with a kiss, she responded but then drew away. He had to follow the rules: dinner, polite conversation, brandy and then Beverley would invite him to the bedroom where she would have changed into some appropriate negligee and he would be allowed to begin.

Things progressed accordingly and she eventually drifted off to the bedroom.

"Give me ten minutes, honey. Then I'll be ready for you. There are some cigars in the box if you want one..."

He waited ten minutes, staring out of the window at the rainy night. Then he followed her in. As usual she had set everything up: subdued lights, soft music, candles, even rose petals on the bedcover. Jesus - she though she could make sex into some romantic novelette. It must never seem dirty or sweaty or rough. Beverley was lying on the bed, drinking champagne.

"Pour yourself a glass, Terry." He declined and walked over to her. He began to undress, feeling more and more like some sort of sacrificial animal. His dick was required to prove to this woman that she was still breathing. When he was down to his shorts, she whispered. " Let me." And she removed them for him. With a sudden start, he realised that he was flaccid. To cover his confusion, he lay down and began to kiss and fondle her. Beverley had a stunning body; she was at the gym at six every morning before work and ate sparingly. But no matter how much he touched and stroked and explored her luscious curves and valleys, his dick was not responding.

"What's the matter, Terry? Have you drunk too much?" He lay back and jerked himself.

"Don't do that!" Beverley said.

"Why not?"

"It's disgusting Terry. You're masturbating!"

"I'm trying to get it up. You got a better idea? You won't wank me or suck me off so what else can I do?"

"I think you'd better go. I don't like your manner. I'm not some cheap tart." 

Terry stood up and threw his clothes back on. He suddenly couldn't wait to get out of there.

"Don't be embarrassed Terry. It happens to all men eventually. Maybe it's your age. Have you thought of Viagra?" He glared back, his expression dark.

"Maybe you need to get your cunt defrosted, love," he snapped. Somehow he knew that was the last sentence they would ever exchange.

Out on the street, rain dripping down, he lit up and walked to his car. As he opened the door, he heard a voice.

"Gotta light, mister?" He spun round, half expecting Annie. The voice belonged to a young woman. She had a look of Annie; small, slender and masses of black curls. She was wet and her blue eyes were dark rimmed.

Terry took out a box of matches. "Got a fag as well?" He gave her one and lit it for her.

"What are you doing out here in the rain on your own?"

"Business." He frowned. She must be about eighteen.

"Come on, I'll take you home. Get in."

She smiled knowingly and scuttled round to the other side and jumped in. "Great car. I always come round this car park. Pick up guys like you with money. Easy work."

"I'm not a John. I'm taking you home."

"You don't wanna fuck? Then let me out. I can't afford to go home." She lunged for the door; Terry pulled over and stopped her. "How much?"

"Depends. What d'you want."

"The works."

"Two hundred."

"Here." Terry pulled out his wallet and gave her two hundred dollars. "Now I take you home."

She grinned. "You can stay if you like. I'll give you a freebie in the morning. I don't usually get guys like you. They are usually old and fat." She ran her hand up his thigh and cupped his groin. "And small. Not like you. I bet that would fill a girl up!" She gave him a squeeze.

"Honey. I'm not picking you up. The money has no strings. Go home. Get a good night's sleep."

She told him the address and he drove her there. It was a tawdry little flat over a shop.

"Come up, mister. Have a drink. You look a little lonely." 

Terry was not sure why he followed her up the poky stairs and into the flat. It was sparsely furnished and untidy. Her prize possession seemed to be a collection of stuffed toys; he wondered exactly how old she was.

"Wanna beer?" He took a can and they both drank. "You married?" Terry shook his head. "Got a girl?" He shook his head again. "Then you need a fuck, don't you? Can't use your hand every night. Don't be shy. It's nothing to me. I do it ten times a day and you're a nice bloke. Clean, good looking. You won't get a better offer tonight, love."

Terry stood up as if to go and then stopped. She sensed his hesitation.

"What do you want? I do it all. You paid two hundred- but you got to wear something. I'm not taking chances..."

The girl walked up to him and unzipped his pants. "What do you want, love? You have to tell me, you know."

"Blow me."

He leant back against the wall and closed his eyes. The girl was experienced and she had him hard in a short time. He felt dirty and ashamed but her mouth made him feel like a man again. Dropping his eyes to watch her, he saw the thick black curls and for an instant it was Annie but as he cried out and came he knew that that was just a dream. As he pumped into the girl's mouth, he felt a tear run down his cheek. She took a tissue and cleaned him up, tucked him back into his pants and patted him gently.

"That feels better now, doesn't it, love?" She sounded like an old lady. Terry nodded and stumbled towards the door. The girl was already sitting on her couch and cuddling her teddy.

"How old are you, love?"

"Fifteen." He barely made it to the street before he vomited.

Back in his car, he set off but found his mind dislocating again. Suddenly he realised that he was driving along the road home. Parking outside his own house, he watched it in darkness. He woke up at dawn in the same place.

PART NINE

For days, Terry spent most of his free time watching Annie. He followed her to school and to the University and learnt the pattern of her routine. He didn't see her with a guy and began to wonder if there was anybody after all. Then, one lunchtime, parked in the lane by the Faculty of Humanities, he saw them. They were running down the main steps, his arm around her and laughing. The guy was young and very handsome, dark and tall. They made a beautiful couple. Terry realised that he had been holding his breath and he had to remind himself to breathe in and out for a while.

Starting the engine, he followed slowly until they got into her car and drove off. He continued on their tail, a few cars apart, instinctively using his surveillance expertise. But he knew where they were going. She was taking him home. As they swung into the drive, they burst out of the car and he chased her up to the door, catching her and kissing her passionately on the step. She dragged him inside.

Terry left the car and walked up the drive. Going round to the back of the house, he took out his flick knife and expertly unlocked the back door with a slight click. Stepping into the familiar kitchen, clutter from breakfast still scattered around, toys on the floor, football lying in the corner, he made his silent way through his home.

Voices upstairs. He could hear laughter and giggling and he knew what was going on. He should leave. There was nothing but disaster waiting if he went further, but he found his feet on the stairs and slipped up, remembering the stairs that creaked. When had he ever learnt that? The bedroom door was open and clothes were scattered at the entrance. Terry wondered if someone had stabbed him; there was a pain so deep inside him he thought he must be wounded. Memories flashed before his eyes of the nights he had loved Annie in that same room. The picture before him wiped them all away. Annie was kneeling before a naked young man and she was giving him head.

Terry walked downstairs and out of the front door. He sat in the car stunned. And then he cried. He cried all the way as he drove home and rode up to his apartment. He lay on the floor and cried. He didn't think he would ever stop.

Annie picked the children up from school and took them to a friend's house. It was a birthday party. After depositing them she went home and cleared up the house. She stripped her bed and washed the sheets; it bothered her that the children might lie on sheets where she had made love to another man who was not their father. Back in the kitchen, she tidied the breakfast things and went to take out the rubbish. With a shock, she realised that the back door was open slightly. How could that be? She distinctly remembered locking it this morning when she dragged Liam in from ruining his school uniform playing football in the rain.

Looking at the floor, she realised there were footprints leading through the kitchen; they were a man's size. Was there someone in the house? Taking a carving knife from the block, she searched from room to room, but there was no one there.  Something was nagging at her. Outside her bedroom, she stood on something hard and looked down. Lying on the floor was a flick knife.

Annie took it gingerly in her hand and turned it over. It was a specialist knife, not a kid's toy, with a long, narrow blade like a stiletto. It was Terry's. He had always thought she didn't know he carried it. Who did he think did his laundry? With a flash of recognition she realised that Terry had been in the house and had dropped the knife that he had used to force the back door. It was lying on the blouse that she had thrown down as Brad and her had wrestled each other into the bedroom. Oh God! He must have watched them!

It occurred to her that Brad might be at risk. She had dropped him off at his apartment before she picked the kids from school; had Terry followed them? Racing to the phone, she dialled his number, begging him to pick up. In her mind were pictures of Terry bursting in and beating him to pulp or breaking his neck or slitting his throat. Just as she was about to put down the phone, he answered.

"Brad, are you alright?"

"Yeah, Anna, what's the matter? I was having a shower. You OK?"

"Listen, I think my husband was in the house when we were having sex. In fact I think he watched us..."

"The sick bastard..."

"Whatever. He's dangerous, Brad. You don't know much about him but he's a ... he could be a killer if he was angry enough. Please- go somewhere for the night. I'll try and get to him. See if I can calm him down."

"Why should he care? You're getting a divorce."

"Because he still loves me, Brad. He never stopped." She put down the phone.

Annie drove at speed to Terry's apartment block. If he were there, she would warn him to back off. If he was difficult she would call the police and apply for a court order. He would not come creeping back into her home again. The concierge of the block let her go up to his floor; she knew she was Terry's wife and said he was at home; she had just seen him a short while before. Outside the door, she rang but there was no answer. Banging on the door, she called his name. Still no answer. Annie felt in her pocket and pulled out the flick knife. He had once showed her how to open a lock with a blade. She wondered if she still remembered. Fiddling for a while with it she heard the click and pushed the door open.

The apartment was in darkness- he had never opened the curtains. Annie stepped in- it was a mess; not the way he usually lived. He was so normally so meticulous and organised. As she rounded the large settee, she saw that he was asleep on the floor. Annie wondered if he was drunk. Kneeling down by his side, she realised with a shock how haggard he looked- his face was contorted even in sleep and his eyes were dark-rimmed. He hadn't shaved and his hair was longer and more unkempt than usual. She instinctively pushed it off his face and then she realised that his cheeks were wet. He had been crying. He had watched her and another man and he had gone home and cried. Brad wasn't at risk and nor was she. He knew he had no rights over her life. But it didn't make him hurt any less.

What must it have been like for him? How would she feel, even now, at the sight of him in another woman's arms? Memories washed over her; years of memories of all they had shared- the joy, the laughter, the tears, the pain, the children, the pleasure. All the things they had meant to each other since he had found her as a shy, lonely girl and made her into the woman she was today. Annie rested her head on his strong chest and cried silently. After a while, she lifted up her head.

"Terry? Wake up. It's me."

She saw his eyes flicker open and a look of shock pass over them. "What are you doing here?" His tone was guarded.

"I came to return this." She held up his knife.

Terry sat up and rubbed his hand through his hair. "I shouldn't have been there. But I couldn't stop myself. Who is he? He looks like a kid. Does he live with you?"

"His name is Brad; he's a doctoral student. The kids have never met him. I don't intend for them to meet him. He's a friend. We go out and... I get frustrated, Terry, I need sex. He's just a fuck buddy really. It's easy and uncomplicated and it's the only time I get to myself. I wish you hadn't seen it. I'm so sorry."

Terry nodded. "As long as he looks after you."

"No, Terry, that's your job. No one looks after people like you do." They sat down facing each other in the gloomy room. "I think we need to talk."

They talked. Annie told him how much she wished she had relented in her stubborn desire to punish him. She still disagreed with what he had done but it shouldn't have driven them apart.  It was a sin that they had thrown away a strong and passionate marriage so easily. The children were devastated and she felt dragged down by their suffering. She was lonely and adrift. Many of their friends no longer seemed to involve themselves with her; she was a lone woman and she thought the wives feared she might move in on their husbands-  'as fucking if' Annie exclaimed and it brought a smile to his lips. It had occurred to her that she ought to go back to the UK but she couldn't take Zoe and Liam from him; they would never forgive her- she would never forgive herself. That was that. Brad just brought a little sunshine into her life. Made her forget for a while.

"Do you ever think of me when you're with him?" Terry asked suddenly.

She shook her head. "Never. That's the only time that I don't think about you."

Terry paused and thought about what she had said and then began to speak himself. He told her how angry her rejection of him had made him feel. He had found it hard to forgive her for that. Then he told her about the women. He even admitted how, of late, he was finding it hard to sustain an erection; a fifteen-year old prostitute had been the only one who had managed to do it for him. Annie was astonished at how sordid it all seemed.

"I feel like I'm not the man I was any more. I'm getting older and I've lost the things that should be mine. And I haven't the strength to fight my way back any more." It was a brutally honest admission and she knew how much it cost his pride to say it, especially when she was enjoying great sex with a younger man.

"I have to go and pick up the children. Terry, this has been a good talk. Let's talk some more soon."

She went over and kissed his cheek. "You are still the man I married. You will never be less than that. The best man I have ever known or ever will know. The father of my children. My friend."

PART TEN

"Any questions?

"The usual end to the lecture and most of the students were trying to avoid her gaze and shuffling papers.

"Miss? May I ask you something about Neanderthal man?"

Annie's head snapped up to the top row. He was standing there dressed smartly and looking much better than the wreck he had been the last time she had seen him.

"It isn't on the syllabus. See me after class." But she smiled and so did he.

As she left the empty lecture theatre, he held open the door for her.

"It's about time you signed up for classes. That's three times in eight years," Annie observed. "What do you want this time?"

"Fancy dinner on me? Expensive restaurant - you can fleece me again, if you like."

"Are you that desperate for a blow job?" At that they both burst out laughing; it was so good to laugh with him again.

"Actually, I'd settle for anything these days. Well, are you up for it? Saturday night? Might even take you dancing."

Annie chewed on her lip. "It's a long way back, Terry. You know that, don't you? We might never even get near."

Terry nodded and looked away; his eyes were intense and determined. She knew that look.

"I know. And we will. I hardly ever lose a client. "

"I hope you don't think I put out on the first date. I'm not that sort of girl."

"No. You'll make me sweat before I get lucky. But I have a lot of style, you know? You might not be able to resist a charm offensive from me."

Annie grinned. "You big head. It's a good job I already know what's on offer. That's your ace card, Thorne. Use it! Now, piss off- I've got work to do."

Annie strolled down the corridor knowing full well he would be watching her sway. Her butt did it to him every time. She couldn't remember when she had felt this good.

"Mum? Are you going out again?" Zoe wandered into the bedroom as Annie put the finishing touches to her makeup.

"Yes, sweetie. Lori is coming over to sit with you. You know how you love that. She said she would bring her latest CD and teach you some new dances."

"She'll bring Kenny as well. They make us go to bed so they can kiss."

"You are supposed to go to bed. Don't be awkward, Zoe. Mummy needs to see her own friends sometimes."

"But this is the third time this week! You never stay in with us. You're supposed to be our Mum!"

"I am your Mum. Zoe- be fair. It's just a few hours."

Zoe threw herself on the bed and stared at the ceiling. She had on that stubborn expression that always reminded her of Terry. Annie smiled to think of his pugnacious  look on her pretty little daughter's face.

"Mum?"

"Yes, honey?" Annie fastened her earrings and sprayed on an extra squirt of perfume.

"Have you got a boyfriend? Is that why you go out?"

Annie turned and looked at the little girl. She joined her on the bed.

"Come here. Sit on my knee." She swept back Zoe's thick dark curls and tried to secure them back in the ponytail. "I am going out with a man tonight."

Zoe's face creased up and tears began to prick at her eyes.

"I knew it! I don't want another Daddy!" She burst into tears.

Annie held her to her. "Sweetie, don't cry. Listen. I want to tell you something. I didn't want you to know but I can't let you think that I would... Zoe, I am seeing a man tonight. I'm going to dinner with Daddy. I have been out with him twice this week. We are trying to make friends again."

The little girl breathed deeply and her mouth fell open. "Oh, Mummy... does that mean Daddy can come home?"

"I don't know. But I hope so. One day soon. When the time is right."

She whooped with pleasure and began to wriggle off her mother's knee.

"Zoe, just a minute! Don't tell Liam. He's too little. He will get all excited and I'd rather wait until later. Promise me. It will be our little secret... OK?"

She nodded and flung her arms around her mother, covering her face with kisses. The doorbell rang. It was Lori and Kenny. Shortly after, the phone rang.

"I'm outside when you're ready."

"Give me a minute. I'll just sort the kids out."

Annie settled them all before the TV and showed them the snacks and reminded them of bedtime. Then picking up her wrap, she slipped out of the door and down the driveway.

Terry was waiting, leaning on the side of the car, smiling. "How's everything?  Those two behaving themselves?"

"'Course not. They'd be ailing for something if they were!"

He reached over and kissed her gently on the lips, peeling away slowly, leaving an imprint of his touch behind on her mouth. "You look beautiful, Annie. Like you always do."

She flushed. "Only you make me look like this." He stroked her cheek and his face grew serious. He looked up, as if to control his emotions, and suddenly his face cracked into a broad grin.

"We are under surveillance.  SWAT team have us in their sights. Bandits at one o'clock."

Annie looked up and followed his line of vision. There, leaning on the windowsill of the guest room were two little faces giggling down at them. Terry raised his fingers and mimicked shooting them.

Annie burst out laughing. "I just told Zoe to keep it a secret! That lasted about two seconds! Look at their little faces! Oh, God!" She put her hand to her own face to try and stem the tears.

He put his arm around her. "Do you really want dinner out? Haven't you got some of your left over crap to serve me inside? Let's go and see the kids."

"There is a bit of my infamous meatloaf... on second thoughts, even Liam pulled his nose up at that. Let's call for a Chinese..." She pulled him back towards the house and heard the distant cheer as the two little children raced down to open the front door.

"Well, that was fun. How many times does Liam have to watch Toy Story before he gets fed up?" Terry inquired as he threw himself back down on the settee after putting the two children to bed.

"He still has at least a million viewings left in him. Thought you were enjoying it?"

"Not enough sex in it for me." Terry grinned.

"He's not interested in anything but fighting yet but the day will come. You'll be searching his room for dirty magazines before you know it."

"What - to read myself?"

They laughed. "Want a drink or something? Should I open another bottle of wine?" Annie asked. He shook his head.

"Watch a movie? I have some more grown up DVDs somewhere if you like..."

He shook his head.

"What do you want to do then, Terry?" Annie stood before him with her head on one side. He reached out and pulled her onto his knee.

"I want to love you. That's all I ever wanted since the day I met you. Can I stay?"

"This is your home."

"I need to ask. You have the right to say no. I blew it last time I tried. I don't want to make that mistake again." Terry said with a sigh.

"Last time we both blew it. I was a stupid hard faced cow. You were a stubborn mule. No one's to take the blame. What is done- is done. Stay. Never leave again -even if I drive you up the wall. Even if I feed you my meatloaf! Even if I never do the ironing or clear the kitchen or I mess up all your files or I..."

Terry kissed her. "Actually they were among the things I missed the most," he admitted with a sheepish grin.

"Let's go up. See if we still remember how." She pulled him to his feet and he gathered up in his arms. Wrapping around his neck, kissing the skin of his throat already rough with shadow and inhaling his familiar scent, she nestled as he carried her up the stairs, whispering in her ear.

At the door to their room he paused and Annie felt him tense. She realised he must have remembered the last time he had stood there; she had no idea how she might help him deal with that.

"That guy. You talk to him?" His voice was gravelly and low.

Annie nodded. "The same day you... I knew then I couldn't go on with it. I felt sordid. I had never treated sex like that before and I suddenly realised that I wasn't cut out to be that kind of woman. I need love, Terry."

He carried her inside and sat her on the bed, stroking her face in that tender gesture that he had, his finger tracing a pattern down her cheek, his head tilted to observe her. "What did he say?"

"He cried. We weren't on the same page, Terry, although I thought we were. He loved me and I hurt him badly. He didn't deserve that. I toyed with him and I shouldn't have. I always thought I was a decent person but I'm not so sure now. I'm selfish and I use people. Look at how I treated Mel and Dino. They would never have treated me like that in a hundred years. The things I said to you.  I slept with a man nine years younger than me and broke his heart. I tore my children from their father. How can you ever forgive me?

He shrugged and exhaled. "If you knew some of the things I've done in my time you would seem like a saint. Use people? Meet the king. I bleat about women letting me down- you know how many I've let down? No, neither do I. There were so fucking many. Taken and moved on, all round the world. Walked into a room and knew I could have anyone I wanted. Young, old, married, single - whatever. And I did. Made promises I knew I would never keep. Talked of love when I meant something quite different. Been doing that since I was a teenager. Not the sort of man you'd want for Zoe."

Annie wiped the tear from his cheek. "That was years ago. You put it behind you. You married me and gave me everything. You never let me down. You never told me anything that you didn't mean. It's not the same as throwing it away when you have it. That's what I did."

"You don't know what I did. To save Dino... I ..." Annie put her finger on his lips.

"No, Terry. Not this time. Sometimes we can know too much about each other. Some things you should never know. I'm so ashamed that you had to see Brad and me... Let's just put it aside. I can barely deal with my own guilt, never mind..."

"So- you're as fucked up as I am. Big deal. You make mistakes. So do I. You back yourself into a corner and then let rip. So do I. Seems like you and me, we're definitely on the same fucking page," he laughed ruefully. "But there's one thing we've got that saves us."

"What's that, Terry?" Annie whispered.

"We love each other. We just can't stop."

Love. Strange animal. Only a hair's breath from hate.  So they spoke of love and then they made love as they had done so many times before. Since those mad crazy days when they first met, days when they hardly left his bed, bodies sore and aching with love. Through those desperate times when they had used love to relieve the nightmares of his job or the pain of separation or the fear of loss. On through the routine married love, that end-of-the-day coming together to acknowledge that they were still a man and woman first, despite their other roles in life. And those occasional moments when a light in his eye or a spring in her step made them reach for each other and love allowed them to touch the heavens. All those things were there that night but something else, too, something that they both knew now and never wanted to forget again. Like the way one always sees life differently if it has been nearly snatched away. Or how you hold your children more closely when they have been lost and found. They made love with gratitude for what they had and had so nearly discarded. Each other.

Light dapples on closed eyelids, hand resting on soft breast, the peach skin curve of a woman presses against the hard velvet ridge of a man, leg thrown over, bodies slowly stir, lips make contact with tender flesh, half- uttered sounds escape from dreaming brains. Limbs entwine and hands seek out. Fingers link, neck arches back to welcome the warm wet mouth of the other. Instinctive postures are assumed: man rises over, woman parts beneath, a sudden urge to thrust, a smooth entry oiled by last night's love and this morning's desire. Gasp. Eyes open. Recognition. Smile.

"Morning, love." Morning Love.

"Dad! Mum! Wake up!" Liam.

"What you doing?" Zoe.

Mother rolls away, Father slumps prone and buries his head in the pillow, groaning quietly.

"Just....saying... good morning." Mum answers.

"Were you kissing?"

"Sort of."

Liam is uninterested. "Dad, can you fix my gun? It won't shoot."

Zoe unsatisfied. "Mum, why are you and Dad bare?"

"Er..."

"I haven't brought my clothes back yet, princess." Dad appears to have recovered his poise.

"Mum's clothes are here..."

"They won't fit me, love."

Zoe giggles. "I didn't mean that..."

"Dad... Dad... the bullets won't shoot."

"Come here. Where d'you get this? Looks like a replica. Should he have this, Annie?  It looks like the real thing..."

"Toys are very realistic these days."

"Did you buy it for him?"

"No, of course not! It was a present. Someone bought it for his fifth birthday."

"Some bloody fool."

"Harry, I think."

"Typical. Has he got any sense?"

"Since when have you gone all anti-gun lobby?"

"I don't like kids playing with guns. They are not toys. Makes killing seem cool."

Annie snorted. "Like you didn't play with guns when you were little? Or when you were big as well for that matter."

"Don't start, Annie. It's too early in the morning..." Terry continued to check out the toy gun. Liam was fascinated by how his father moved it slickly in his hands.

"Mum, where do babies come from?" Zoe was still thinking. Wheels were turning.

"Remember I told you about Daddies putting babies into Mummies?"

"Yes, but...how?"

"Can we talk about this later, sweetie?" Annie countered.

"Is that what you and Dad were doing? Are you going to have another baby?"

Terry shot Annie a look. It said "Your call, honey."

"No, Zoe. You two are perfect and we don't want to share you with any one else."

The little girl smiled. "Thank goodness for that! For a minute there I thought you were having sex."

"What's sex, Dad?" Liam asked.

Their parents didn't answer. They were laughing too much.