It suddenly occurred to me as I was feeding Maia early one morning on the deck while Terry slept on unawares in exhaustion inside. I was so relieved to see him finally give into rest and let his body ease down. Somehow, once we had reached Dino, it was as if a wave of tension had passed from him. He knew that he did not have to stand guard every minute now; he had a worthy second who would not let us down. So there he lay unconscious in the sheets, face relaxed and almost boyish, as if care had floated from him, if just for awhile, and I took comfort from the rhythmic sound of his deep breathing to know that he was there, so close and safe.

It was a glorious morning. This house has the perfect vantage point from which to greet the day. While my daughter sucked as rhythmically as her father snored, her little eyes shut and her fingers reaching for me, I thought at last about going to the Temple.

We had been there at Dino's a full day and there was no reason to delay anymore. But I was still reluctant. It wasn't that I didn't want to meet the others but well, I didn't want to meet the others. Not yet. Until I had come to some understanding with the goddess, I didn't want anyone else implicated or harmed. I had no idea what she might be capable of and the thought that any of the Brothers or Sisters could be somehow hurt by her wrath was more than any of us could take on at the moment

The Temple was always busy. I had wondered if Terry could sneak us in under cover of darkness- he has the expertise- but a baby is an unpredictable commodity even for an SAS-trained specialist. The answer to how we might proceed came unexpectedly to me after I put Maia back in her cradle. I had decided to log on, using Dino's account- I know that was naughty, but I was not yet ready to announce that I was back. And there it was. The answer. Lots of mails about Max's birthday and the Brothers arranging a surprise 40th for him at his house. Date? May 5th. Today. The Temple would be empty tonight. Wow...what a coincidence. It seems Maximus bails us out every time- although I am beginning to realize now that there are no real coincidences. Each careful step of the way had been planned here and I felt like I was being steered along blindly, stumbling in the dark towards some light ahead.

So that is what we did. During the day we decided how this would play, although Terry and Dino were very uncomfortable with it all. For a start, Dino was not really buying the whole story - or at least he was resisting it for all he was worth. Who could blame him really? It was a bloody ridiculously unlikely scenario and he hadn't quite been witness to the twists and turns and the awesome power of this deity as we had. On the other hand, he couldn't offer an alternative explanation either, so he had to admit that what we had come up with was, at the moment, as good as any.

Then there was Terry, who at first resolutely refused to let me enter the inner sanctum on my own with Maia. I can't say I blame him. I was shit scared myself if the truth were known and to imagine his predicament if we were thrown back again and he was outside unable to help, was clearly not one I cared for either of us to bear. But if She wanted to destroy us then She would and whether he was there or not, it would make no difference. I just had this strong gut feel that this was something that was about women - and that only I could address it. I also had an inexplicably sure conviction that we would come to no harm. It would make no sense- she could have reached us anytime the past few days- but She had not. Somehow She wanted me to come to her and the time was now- She had made it possible and was enticing us in.

One other issue clouded the moment for us all, although it also seemed to back up our initial theories. Lachlan and Heather were gone, but not as I had been taken. They had disappeared together from the Temple on the day that they had entered and not a trace of them had been heard of since. What could that mean? Firstly, they had not been punished by separation as terry and I had been- it appeared that they had been banished together- or maybe that they had willingly gone, perhaps? It suggested that they were back across a portal- but whose? They were together- what was She demanding of them? Were they struggling to get back or had they taken this route by choice? Why had they never left us any clue- had their removal been so abrupt? Whatever the answer, Dea had not proceeded as She had done with Terry and me and that gave us hope that she was more interested in observing our reactions than actively punishing our law breaking. But it was still merely conjecture.

The news about Heather and Lachlan was very hard to take. I cried a lot when Dino broke it to us; Terry just went very quiet and turned in on himself. Only Maia in his arms could bring the smile back to his face but even so, it was tinged with sadness. I knew what he was thinking. He had wanted for us all to be together as the children grew. We had often spoken of it as a foursome, lying sprawled out on our lounge fooling about or during our trip to Oz last winter (Terry and Lachlan would say last summer, of course!)

"They gotta have swimming lessons. That's very important. A little Oz has to be a water baby."

"Yeah....and cricket...they have these great academies now that really bring them on- they can out-bowl anyone on the Pom team by the time they're 10."

"Ballet...it's really good for the posture and poise."

"Ballet? No fucking chance. They wouldn't have a pair of tights with a big enough pouch for my son..."

"She might prefer a tutu, Terry!"

"Mind you, he'd have a very firm foothold for some ballerina when he lifted. Like a bloody ledge..."

"They'll be inseparable. Like two brothers."

"Sisters."

"Aussie men make sons."

"No women in Oz then? Sheesh. No wonder you both left!"

 

And so we had laughed and teased in our innocence and now it was unclear if we would ever see them again, let alone that Maia might one day sit and play with her 'cousin'. It was so cruel. So needlessly unfair. What harm were we at the end of the day? Wherever they were, they were constantly on our minds and even when we did not speak, I knew that we were thinking of them. I felt most sorry for Dino. He had kept his lonely vigil and done what he could for us all. Carrying out Heather's instructions to bring the diaries of our past months into the light, revealing our journals to the others; he had been there for Terry, done everything he could for all of us - but still he was left out in the cold. He had lost Heather who was so important to him, more so than any of us could ever understand. But Dino was Dino and he carried on regardless, taking pleasure in Maia almost equal to our own. In a way she was his child, too. He had been carrying this secret almost as long as we had.

Dead of night. Well, after ten anyway, when Dino rolled the car to a halt by the gate and inserted his key card. The grille parted smoothly and we drove in without headlights, just in case. Terry jumped out and took Maia from my arms as I freed her from the car seat and eased myself out. I was still fairly weak and half-faint with nervousness. I took her back and he placed his hand on my shoulders as he steered me through the silent house to the passageway which led to the Temple sanctuary.

"Leave me here, Terry. Go and wait in the lounge. Have a drink. A smoke. I'll be as quick as I can."

"Jesus Christ, I don't want this...let me come with you...I can't leave you both..."

"Terry- she didn't expel you! This is between me and Dea. And Maia is the bridge. For once, Terry, let me be the one to take the lead. Because I feel it so strongly that it has to be me. She will not speak to you. She wants to talk to me."

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "Then...leave the door open and shout like fuck if She does anything. Dino and I will be listening..."

"And do what? Even covert ops would have a problem against the forces of darkness- or maybe the forces of light? Whatever. Terry, I will be fine. Now go and have a drink. This will soon be over- trust me?" I grinned and he just made a lunge for my lips, kissing me as only he can. His reaction was almost boyish in its helpless love; he knew I was right but every instinct in his male psyche railed against leaving me to face the enemy alone. Only I no longer consider her to be an enemy. She might actually be the greatest friend we will ever have.

I pushed on the heavy oak doors, my back against them, my arms full of my child, and then slipped inside. The sanctuary was silent, incense rising along with candle smoke before the effigy of the goddess standing on it plinth at the far end of the room. I had always loved the silence here, although it had seemed to me in the past a mere affectation. A sort of unusual design feature in this most singular of residences- the shrine to sex and the female spirit which was the guiding notion of our unique world. But it had never held any mystic significance to me. I know Isobel guarded it with reverence, in accordance with her beliefs but, in truth, people like me and Terry just shrugged and were amused. OK, we're cynics, but we've never pretended to be anything else. Not so cynical now, eh? In fact it was pretty ironic that we should be the ones to whom the goddess may have revealed herself. But then - isn't that always how these things work? Doubting Thomas, Paul struck blind on the road to Damascus, Zacchaeus up the tree...

I made my way across the cool marble of the floor and knelt down before the shrine. Placing Maia in her nest of blankets on the floor, I prostrated myself before the statue as I had seen devotees do many times before in churches and temples. I closed my eyes and begged the goddess to hear me and show me a sign that she was willing to accept me back and that my daughter and man were not at risk. Nothing happened. The statue remained fixed and immobile, the still air undisturbed; I had no sense that any presence but myself was out there observing me. What if I was wrong? Completely wrong about everything and some other sword was about to fall from an unseen height?

I heard Maia rustle about and make a little protest cry but I still lay there, wishing for a sign. And then it came in the least expected form- but then, shouldn't I have realized this all along?

"Uma?" A familiar voice, deep and low from the door behind me. Only one man calls my name like that.

"Maximus?" I knelt up and turned my head; we stared at each other in shock. I saw him swallow and struggle to compose himself, then he stepped forward and came to me, kneeling down beside me, taking me by the upper arms.

"You are back? Safe? What happened?" Then his eyes traveled to Maia and he started. "The child...born already...how can that be?"

I caressed his face, delighted in his presence. "It is a very long story and one day you will know it all. But she is here. My daughter and I are well and safe."

"Where is Terry?"

"With Dino. In hailing distance."

He blew air out slowly. "I have been so anxious...there was nothing I could do..."

"You did more than enough. Terry told me what you did. We are forever in your debt for that. I should have called you.... but the past few days..."

He shook his head. "No matter...as long as you are safe. How old is she?" He reached out and touched her little cheek; she rooted in the direction of his finger, looking for milk- he smiled. "Nothing there for you, little one...I am not your mother..."

"Five days old." 

"Born on the First?" I nodded. He looked up at the statue. "Her sacred day - very auspicious. She must have forgiven you," he observed solemnly.

"You think so? Maximus- what do you know? Is there more I don't know?" Suddenly I wondered. Who would be closer to her than this man for whom her worship was inbred since his childhood?

He shrugged. "She is the Mother- my people would call her Bona Dea. Different people call her different things. She has many names. She is our guide and the bringer of all bounty in our lives. She bestows our gender and our fertility, blesses our crops and flocks, she is the female spirit that watches over our families and the bringer of peace. She is one of the old deities from before the time that the warrior swept over the earth and brought war and misery- but she has not gone, she merely waits for her day to dawn again..."

"Our daughter's name is Maia. Terry thought of it. Out of the blue."

Maximus stopped and looked at me and then his expression changed. "Maia? The goddess of the Spring? The consort of Vulcan who through her love of Jupiter brought forth Mercury, the bringer of good tidings? This is no happenstance, Uma. It is HER will. This has all been Her will. From the very beginning...She has been watching us and waiting. I did not know what Her intention was....for a very long time, I did not know. But She had an intention and I was part of it and so were you. She told me this much but I did not understand..."

"When? When did She tell you?" I caught his face in my hands and made him look at me. "When does She come to you?"

He hunched his shoulders. "In dreams, sometimes. Why, only this morning, I had a dream and... Sometimes She seems to speak to my mind. But the true meaning is not always clear- it is like a Riddle of the Sphinx, you know? I can't explain but I feel that She is with me and that somehow She wants me to be with you...or there for you...I know you don't need my protection, not anymore...but you have it, you know that? For what it is worth?"

His face was serious and earnest; he does not find it easy to speak of these things. I wondered how long She had been whispering to him about me and had She believed that I would one day turn to him? I thought of our time together in Rome and wondered then if that is what She had expected - but time and time again, we both confounded her- a man and woman not behaving as She imagined we would. And so Terry and Uma forced their way through, not Maximus and Uma, and became the ones to test Her law and ultimately achieve what She had wished for all along: that her people would go forth and multiply. Hando and Tina- the unlikeliest lovers, never mind parents, then Heather and Lachlan, the newest couple. Isobel and Cort had flirted with it, too- She must have sensed then that her plans were coming to fruition- but they stopped at the first hurdle. But then there was Nash, the snake, who had held the key - but it depended arbitrarily on whom he chose to tell- and he is unpredictable at the best of times. So he told me - and the rest is history.

"Maximus- the day you stop protecting me will be a sad day in my life. I never want you to stop. Now you have the two of us to care for. But you will get your reward. Dea chose you as much as she chose me and Terry. There is still a place for you and me. I love you, in my fashion, and cherish you in my life. When I can, I will be with you again- she gives us that great blessing which we would not have in any other life..."

He nodded and bent his head as if in prayer to the goddess and then he picked up my child and sat back on his haunches, smiling and cooing at her. "She is her mother's daughter, thank the Gods! Look, how she wrinkles her tiny nose! Men will fall down at her feet and worship..."

I laughed. "Not if her father has any say!" Maximus chuckled and nodded his assent.

"But what is this? You gave her a bulla? I am surprised," he commented, fingering a golden chain around her neck holding a small locket.

"A what?" I asked.

"A bulla is..."

"I know what a bulla is, Max...I mean where did it come from?" We both looked up at the silent figure towering down over us. Max bowed his head over the child.

"Oh Great Mother, we thank you for this gift and sign of your beneficence, may this child be under your protection all the days of her life..."

"Max? She gave it to her? You can't mean that...?"

"Where else did it come from? You have your answer now. This child is touched by the Goddess. She will never come to harm. It is her future that your trials have been assuring. You have proved your valour, both of you, and now you are worthy parents for her Chosen One..."

We looked at each other and then Maia, kicking innocently in his arms. Suddenly the truth dawned on us both. "Bring Terry in. There is something he must now do. Raise your child before her. Acknowledge this tiny girl before the Goddess. It is decreed..."

Rising to my feet, I went to the door and called. Terry was there moments later, concern written all over his face. "It's OK...she is safe. I want you to do something..." He stepped in and saw Maximus who was placing Maia back down on the floor.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, but not unkindly.

"I think I was summoned. Pick her up...raise her above your head... call out her name before the Goddess and then it is done."

Terry frowned, looked at me and I nodded that he should do this thing. I watched him walk to his daughter, smile at her in spite of himself, and carry out the task. When she was high up above his head, he looked up at the statue and said "This is our daughter, Maia Christina Ira Thorne. We dedicate her to you."

There was a moment of silence when I closed my eyes and made another request. "Please...take care of Lachlan and Heather, Hando and Tina and their babies - keep them safe..." and then the moment passed and somehow a wave of peace seemed to wash over us all. It was a sensation quite inexplicable, but brought with it a sense of sureness. We were safe and there was nothing else to fear.

I don't know how he knew the words to say but somehow he did, and then he held her close. I am not sure who looked more surprised - Terry, me or Maximus. Then Maximus bowed to the altar and took his leave.

"I have to a party to rejoin. Do you wish to come and join the others? It is a great celebration... a perfect time for you to make peace with everyone... I think they will be glad to see you..."

But before we could respond, a noise broke into the quiet of the Temple. The wail of a tiny baby. But Maia was not crying...